Planet Calamari Zazzle shop


Today on Oprah.... Miss Lucy Fur

Join Oprah and her BFF Miss Lucy Fur on today's show.

Miss Lucy will share what really happened at the so called Brad & Angelina wedding this weekend and how she missed the Poop & Run graduation for nothing!

She will also share the story of her tragic love affair with the Queen's corgi and the ongoing drama of her life with Judd the puppy.

Don't miss today's Oprah!

Special Musical guest.... Celine Dion!


The Morning After

Ohhhhhh please keep those lights off and try not to make any noise. We are so hung over from the Poop & Run Graduation party! What a wonderful event. It was especially fun when we turned out the lights at 8:00 pm for Earth Hour! Woooo hoooo

Congrats to all of you who are now official officers of the Poop & Run Brigade.

And for all those of you who keep asking if the reason Miss Lucy Fur was not there because she was at Brad and Angelina's wedding yesterday... our answer is "What wedding?".

Cheysuli tagged us on Friday for a book meme. We regretfully must pass since our pet human has been too lazy to bother um, we mean so busy working on other stuff. And the truth is the closest book to this iMac is a boring veterinary acupuncture book that would just put all of you to sleep. Forgive us Chey.

Also we felt that there is a far more important matter for The Pooses for Peace to spend time on today. From the Progressive blog Fire Dog Lake comes this info:

"John McCain is breaking the law.

When McCain's presidential campaign was in trouble, he opted-in to public financing through the primary, limiting him to a $54 million spending cap.

But laws aren't for "mavericks"...

McCain's latest spending report, filed by his own campaign, shows he has spent in excess of $58 million so far -- a public admission by his own hand that he has broken the law.

We filed a formal complaint to Federal Election Commission yesterday, and we want you to sign-on for a second delivery of signatures later this week.

Please read and co-sign the letter to the FEC right"

We urge you to have your pet humans sign this.

We are now discussing to engage a Bite & Run Attack in the near future concerning this matter.

Have a great Sunday. Could someone please bring me some ginger ale and asprin?
nubi wan kenobi


You are invited to the

Poop & Run Boot Camp Graduation Party
The Casino Calamari

All Weekend!

All you can eat stinky goodness buffett

With our very special musical guest Phoebe Buffay!

Please join us in singing the Poop & Run Anthem

and a One ...Two... Three...Four...

Smelly Poose, Smelly Poose

What are they feeding you?

Smelly Poose, Smelly Poose

It's not your fault

They won't take you to the vet

You're obviously not their favorite pet

Smelly Poose, Smelly Poose,

It's not your fault

You may not be a bed of roses

You're not friend to those with noses

I'll miss you before we're done

Or the world will smell as one

Smelly Poose, Smelly poose,

What are they feeding you?

Smelly Poose, Smelly Poose

Time to poop and runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

Viva the Poop & Run Patrol! We are so proud of all of you!
The Pooses for Peace


More Volunteers.....

We are so excited that we are receiving more requests from other pooses to join the Poop & Run Brigade. Here are our latest recruits.

Sammy Meezer our Commanding Whapmeister who leads the Whap & Run Patrol has volunteered his new roomie Bill. We are sorry that we do not have a picture of him. Stop by their website and say congrats!

Dear Zevo,
Please accept our applications for the Poop & Run brigade. We have been waiting for an opportunity like this! Not only are we very good poopers, but we are very good at running fast after we poop!

If you need references, we live with Tao and Sarge who can vouch for this.

Lady & Stoli
Poopalina & Poopalus
Perry Hall, MD


Poop and Run?

We received a letter from our dear friend Princess Guacamole on behalf of Tata the dog who would to volunteer her services to our Bite & Run Brigade.

Dearest Zevo, Members of The Pooses for Peace and The Bite & Run Brigade,

There is a dog in Tucson who wants to be part of the bite and run brigade, but she is very old and slow. Her name is Natasha, or "Tata" for short.

She is wondering if senior dogs can be part of a POOP AND RUN brigade. It has the advantage of a more lingering effect, persisting long after the pain of the bites are gone. (She is hoping especially that Congress has carpets.) She also pointed out that it is a homeopathic approach: poop for poop, as it were. Please let her know if you would be open to her idea.

viva la revolucion!

princess guacamole

After much consideration and several staff meetings we have voted in favor of forming a Poop and Run division of the Bite & Run Brigade. Tata has been promoted to the Commanding Officer of the Poop and Run Patrol.

We are now accepting applications for all those who wish to volunteer. Dogs are invited. ........ in fact all animals are invited to participate. Our work is cut out for us this year!

OH...... if you would like to see The Bite Patrol featured in a movie please watch STARDUST. Such excellent Bite Patrol acting by the poose-cast deserving of an Academy Award!

May the Force be with us,
The Pooses for Peace


Max & Bun Buns

Meet Bun Buns and Max.....They live with us........we tolerate them. They make our pet human happy. (We think that our pet humans have watched the movie MirrorMask one too many times)

Since the theme of MirrorMask is "An extraordinary dream quest to rescue a world out of balance" we have invited Max & Bun Buns to be a part of Pooses for Peace. We think the world can be saved by a rag tag team of biting cats,with a flair for fashion, a few dogs and a magical pair of bunny slippers. We can no longer count on humans to save the planet. It is up to us.

We believe there is hope. We believe in magic. We believe that life is a Disney movie and the good guys always win... with the help of animals.

Hope Springs Eternal
The Pooses for Peace

p.s. Join us for our Easter Film Festival at The Casino Calamari tomorrow. We will feature the movie Harvey and MirrorMask.

Plenty of ham, eggs and nip-tinis of all!


We have been napping and purring all week for those in need of our good thoughts. Though not much has changed in Tibet or the home-front we have decided to think positive happy thoughts today. As Scarlett O'Hara said"Oh la de da.. I will think about that tomorrow." is time to celebrate Spring.. a time of hope....of new possibilities........and perhaps even some sun!

We invite all pooses to come celebrate Spring with us at our Casino Calamari. Put on your Easter bonnets, your spring garb and your dancing shoes! There will be a spring pagan ritual starting at 7:00pm followed by dancing and food.

Spring has sprung!
(ok... we have to pretend it sprung here in New England.... a few nip-tinis will help that!)



Purring for Peace

Today is the anniversary of the Iraq War. We wanted to organize a huge Bite & Run Mission to bite all those who voted and funded for this atrocity. However since we are napping for the Dalai Lama this week we thought it best to continue a peaceful revolution with purrs and naps. ( Don't worry.. there will be plenty of biting in the future!)

Sending healing purrs and prayers out to all who have suffered these past 5 years from a needless war.
Sending purrs to all those in Tibet as well.
Sending purrs to all who need them no matter where or who they are.

The Pooses for Peace


Om Mani Padme Nap

The violence in Tibet has heightened and we are worried about the Dalia Lama and the Tibetan people. We are napping extra hard today for all those who need our purrs and prayers. We hope that the UN and the USA will help...... however since Tibet has no oil we doubt if such a miracle will happen. Please take a minute and say a prayer for all those who need help today.

To keep informed on what is happening in Tibet visit

The Pooses for Peace


A Day of Peaceful Napping

The Dalai Lama has asked declared a day of napping and prayers for all those in Tibet who are being persecuted by the Chinese. This is a tragic time for Tibet. Please help by sending healing purrs to those brave people.

The Pooses for Peace

To learn more about Tibet visit

UPDATE! Thanks to the Cat Realm for the info on Tibet Blogs


one.. two... bite bite ..two....bite bite bite.....

We have decided that with all this biting and fighting for the good of this country we needed to do something positive as well. All biting and no play makes for a very cranky bunch of pooses.

We have hope that Cheysuli and/or someone like Obama will be inaugurated on 1-20-09 ending the dictatorship of the Chimp-decider.

As the bigot um, Congressman Steve King said... There will be dancing in the streets if Obama is elected. (How dare he not acknowledge Cheysuli at all!) We agree... there should be dancing for all in the streets to celebrate a day of hope and change for the USA. Why ? Because we are sure the entire planet will dance that day.

The Pooses for Peace have opened a school of dance to prepare everyone for this day of dance. Our instructors are some of the finest dancers. Learn how to be Footloose, to Flash-Dance,to shake it and twist and shout, how to disco, rumba, tango, salsa, bunny hop, hip hop, moon walk or waltz through the streets on 1-20-09 like a pro. We have even hired Elaine Benes from Seinfeld to teach "How not to dance in public"

Classes are filling up fast. Our operators are standing by.
Call now to register for this Spring semester. 1-800-Cha-ChaChaa

Be ready to dance with confidence in the streets on 1-20-09.
Oh what a feeling!!!!!!!!!!


Congressman Steve King Bit


On Friday, Iowa Congressman Steve King announced that terrorists would celebrate if Democratic candidate Barack Obama won the presidency.

King, a Republican, bases his prediction on Obama's pledge to pull troops out of Iraq, his Kenyan heritage and his middle name Hussein. The congressman added "They'll be dancing in the streets because of his middle name, they'll be dancing in the streets because of who his father was."

Yesterday during a radio talk show Congressman King was attacked and bit by several cats wearing black leather jackets and tiaras. One cat was wearing a jedi robe and swinging a light saber. Unconfirmed sources claim to have seen Mike Huckabee's ex dog, Dude wearing fishnets and a sequined t-shirt that said DANCE, running off with the cats.

Congressman King is listed in stable condition at an undisclosed location. The bite marks however formed a permanent scar that reads 1-20-09 Let's Dance!

Authorities have no leads on who the cats are. However we believe it is the work of the infamous Pooses for Peace Bite & Run Brigade. Members of this brigade have all changed their middle names to Hussein to show solidarity. Is this proof they are muslim cats? We at Fox News, a fair and balanced source of all information are sure they are.

Spokes-poose Zevo Hussein Calamari issued a statement this morning. "Congressman King is a buffoon and a bigot. He is absolutely wrong that the terrorists will dance in the streets on 1-20-09. If they did .... that means you could actually find them. No, Congressman King, it will be the citizens of this country who will be dancing in the streets when the Chimp-Decider and his gang of thugs are booted out of Washington. We invite everyone to dance with us on 1-20-09!"


Beyond Being Catty

It is no secret that we cats can sometimes be catty. Yes we snivel about tiaras, who looks the hottest in the latest Versace and who should have the last morsel of ham. But we are nothing compared to those mud slinging humans who seem to dominate this election season.

The Pooses for Peace support Cheysuli for President. However we cannot stand by idly when talk show idiots foaming at the mouth hosts call Obama a muslim terrorist just because he is black and his middle name is Hussein. My roomie Nubi wan Kenobi is black... he has a weird name. Does that make him a terrorist too? (Well our pet human may say otherwise!)

While surfing progressive political blogs this morning i found a brilliant idea. To diffuse the Hussein factor we have decided to use Hussein as our new adopted middle names. What if everyone joined in? Oprah Hussein Winfrey, Bruce Hussein Springsteen, Cindi Hussein Lauper, David Hussein Letterman, Wolf Hussein Blitzer, Nubi Hussein Kenobi, Lucy Hussein Fur, Miss Boo Hussein la Poose.... well you get the idea.

Oh... gotta go Donatella Hussein Versace is on the other line with news about my latest dress.......
ciao ciao
zevo hussein calamari


Back in San Diego

Well ... i just got back from Italy and i found out who stole my tiara. It was not Boo, though she covets it i am sure. It was Judd the puppy. And he not only stole it....he ate it. I get no respect around here.

My pet humans think he is sooooooo adorable and cute. "Oh look at Judd.....isn't he sooooo precious?" Ack!! It is enough to cause a hairball.

Here i am ... one of the bravest members of the Bite & Run Brigade risking my teeth in the name of our constitutional freedoms and other atrocities committed by the Chimp-decider. I am one of the main leaders of Pooses for Peace. A celebrity. BFF with Oprah. And does that count? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do my pet humans care? NO!

I demand justice.
I demand a new tiara.
And i want it NOW..... or else.

lucy fur


Tonight at Cinema Calamari !

In honor of Rex Harrison's birthday we will be showing one of our favorite movies, Doctor Dolittle! All pooses are invited. Tuna nachos and cheese popcorn for all!


This morning at the Vatican

Pregate per la heathen gatti
Pray for the heathen cats

Mio Dio perdona loro per i loro peccati
My God forgive them for their sins

Noi preghiamo che il furto d'arte della Cappella Sistina รจ trovato
We pray that the stolen art from the Sistine Chapel is found

D'ora in poi si prende la costituzione di una collezione. Vi preghiamo di essere generosi. Ho bisogno di un nuovo cappello.
We will now take up a collection. Please be generous. I need a new hat.

Nel nome del Padre, del Figlio e dello Spirito Santo.