Associated Press
The photo shoot went well with Donatella. We were able to shoot Boo for the Italian Vogue, Miss Lucy Fur for the British Vogue and myself for the French Vogue. Those issues do not come out until September. I do hope they air brush those extra pounds we put on over the holidays.
Zevo left me and Luna in charge of running Casino Calamari while she is in Europe with her BFFs Boo and Miss Lucy Fur. 
Benvenuti cari gatti! Come sta il mio caro amico George? Ti ho fatto uno bei vestiti! Si prega di portare il vino più caro per questi gatti!
TMZ
By Associated PressIPSWICH — Police say a wolf that escaped from a Massachusetts wolf sanctuary has returned home on its own and was inebriated.
The 5-year-old female named Nina escaped Wolf Hollow sometime between 6:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. on Monday.
Police Lt. Daniel Moriarty says the animal returned to the sanctuary at about 11 p.m. Moriarty said the wolf apparently climbed up a snowdrift in its pen to get out and was unable to get back inside on its own.
Unconfirmed sources believe that this was the work Jedi cat, Nubi wan Kenobi a member of the infamous Pooses for Peace. Nubi wan wanting to surprise his pet human with a gift for Little Christmas, lured the wolf from the Ipswich sanctuary and rode back to Salem on her back last night. Homeland Security believes that Nina the wolf has joined the Pooses for Peace and was somehow involved in the outburst during Mayor Driscoll's inauguration yesterday.
According to Salem locals, hordes of cats, dogs and skunks held protest signs outside the inauguration ceremony yesterday morning demanding a recount. Pooses for Peace Zevo Calamari was the write in choice for the mayoral election in November. Salem authorities did not count the votes cast by the thousands of cats, dogs, skunks and a few raccoons for Miss Calamari, thus declaring Driscoll the winner. Tensions between Driscoll and Mz Calamari have escalated to a new level.
Extra security was brought in for the ceremony and sources believe the mayor once again wore ankle and knee guards under her only black suit for fear of another Bite & Run incident. However, much to the surprise of everyone the attack did not take place. For some odd reason Mayor Driscoll's black suit was covered in a large amount of fur after the ceremony. She was seen febreezing her pants and taking an antihistamine.
A strange odor did permeate the ceremony and several of those who attended reported their iPhones and earrings to be missing. Others began sneezing and gagging. EMT and Biohazard units were sent in.
Zevo hussein Calamari has been spotted dining with her cohorts in Italy last evening.
Miss Calamari released a statement this morning " Ciao Bella! What wolf? What earrings? George, please pour us another glass of the please."
We had such a lovely time on New Years Eve.. it is too bad none of us can remember much. I do remember drinking lots of blue moont-inis, blue jello shots and dancing on table tops. Everything else is a blurr.
all we are saying .... is give peace a chance!
AP
Zevo .... please call me!
Just one day after a man attempted to blow up a plane, Ivana Trump blew up at passengers before take-off, launching obscenities at cats wearing tiaras aboard the flight to New York.
The former wife of Donald Trump apparently got angry about her seat assignment in first class when she boarded the Delta-Northwest flight. Trump began screaming "I will not sit near those f--king cats. They are nothing but trouble. I know what they did to Lindsey Lohan." Flight attendants offered her a different seat in first class. But she quickly became infuriated at the cats on the plane who began to taunt her about wearing fur and tacky leather pants.
The tabloid THE POST also spoke with a 10-year-old witness, Vincent Cone, who claims that the 60-year-old woman flipped out at the cute cats. "The reason she got so upset was the cats were laughing at her and she started screaming, 'I want my earrings and iPod back now or you will be made into my next coat,'" said Cone. "I liked the cats. They were very funny and they all looked so cute wearing those tiaras. I wish my cat at home dressed nice too."
When flight attendants told Ivana that she was getting kicked off the plane, Trump rushed toward the cockpit, according to Cone. Pilots told her to leave, but she refused to disembark from the plane and the cats helped to move her out of the plane by biting her ankles and knees. After she was off the plane the cats ordered a bottle of champagne and watched the movie That Darn Cat.
No charges have been filed against Mz Trump. She claims that her iPod, earrings and diamond rings and watch are missing.
Happy Birthday Jimmy Buffett!
The Boston Ballet will performing the Nutcracker Ballet tonight at the Wang Theater. Prima Ballerina Twinkle Toes Calamari aka as Luna diPoosalita will make her debut tonight as the Sugar Plum Fairy. Miss Toes was trained by the infamous Mikhail Baryshnikov.
Associated Press
TMZ