Planet Calamari Zazzle shop

2008-02-05

VOTE


The Pooses for Peace are reminding everyone to VOTE!
A Vote for Cheysuli is a Pawsitive Vote.
We want change!


Tomorrow we will resume our battle in the Senate fighting against illegal spying on US citizens. Our Bite Patrols will be on alert. Special Forces are standing by!

So many ankles........ so little time.

2008-02-04


Associated Press
New Orleans

The infamous Pooses for Peace had several floats in this year's Mardi Gras parade. Cats wearing tiaras were seen throwing pink and purple beads to the crowds. On another float, Dude the Bird Dog danced with a drag queen dressed as Liza Minelli. The Bite Patrol marched beside each float wearing their trademark black leather jackets.

Unconfirmed sources have reported the cats left the festivities early so that they could monitor the FISA hearings today in the Senate. Bite Patrol Brigades are on stand by. The only hope is that their pet humans will call their Senators once again to remind them to vote for NO immunity for the telecom companies that have spied on them. Spookes-poose Zevo Calamari issued a warning statement to the Senate " Either vote in favor of the rights of the USA citizens by voting NO to immunity to these big corporations or prepare to be bit! This time we shall show no mercy!"

Special forces led my Jedi Nubi wan Kenobi will be on the campaign trail today protecting Presidential hopeful Cheysuli. No word on whether they will be at today's Senate brawl session.

2008-02-02

ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT

Friday night's Birthday bash for celebrity cat, Miss Lucy Fur at Mo's in Hillcrest was halted at 2:00 am when San Diego police were called in for a disturbance of the peace and reports of a possible riot.

At this time, the facts of the situation remain unclear. Unconfirmed sources claim they witnessed Hillary Clinton taunting rival Presidential Candidate Cheysuli about her hair, when Chey's bodyguard, Jedi Poose Nubi wan Kenobi stepped in and bit her. A fight then broke out between the body guards of Hillary and Chey. Several of Clinton's bodyguards were taken to UCSD Medical Hospital for severe cuts, scratches and light-saber wounds.

In another incident, Keith Olbermann's girlfriend was bit by Zevo Calamari. Miss Calamari has been said to have a huge crush on Keith and felt he should dump his stick insect gal pal for her.

BFF, Miss Boo was seen doing the macarana with Barack Obama while Miss Lucy Fur danced the night away with the Queen's corgis.

Liza Minelli and her adopted son, Dude the Bird Dog were part of the entertainment. All sang happy Birthday to Miss Lucy as Bubba the cat played drums while Bill Clinton joined in with his sax.

No cats were arrested as they fled the scene immediately and were said to have hopped a private jet bound for New Orleans.

No comment has been made by the Clinton Camp.

Coming up next...... Dr Phil miffed he was not invited to Birthday Bash.................

2008-02-01

Happy Birthday Miss Lucy Fur!



All pooses invited! See you there..... dress is California Casual!
Please do NOT mention Dr Phil tonight............
ciao ciao
zevo & boo

I hope you can ALL come to help me celebrate tonight! The corgis are coming, along with Keith Olberman. Hillary and Barack will drop by around midnight to take a welcome break from their campaigning in California before Super Tuesday!
love
miss lucy fur

2008-01-30

MISSING MONETS

Associated Press
Washington, DC

The National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC has reported two Monet paintings missing. The original Banks of the Seine and The Houses of Parliament were replaced by paint by number versions. The switch went undetected until last night when a bored security guard examined the paintings close up. Authorities are baffled on how this heist was pulled off. Security cameras had been shut off and appear to have paw prints on the lenses.

Museum custodians were questioned and only reported they noticed a decrease in mice in the past few days.

2008-01-29

FOX NEWS UPDATE


FOX
FAIR AND BALANCED NEWS

During yesterdays FISA debate, hundreds of cats wearing black leather jackets appeared and began nipping, biting and scratching those Senators who favored immunity for the telecom companies who are accused of illegally spying on US citizens. No mercy was shown on those Democrats who sided with GW Bush on this issue.

In the end, four Dems crossed over to vote with the Republicans: Sens. Mark Pryor (D-AR), Ben Nelson (D-NE), Blanche Lincoln (D-AR) and Mary Landrieu (D-LA). These Senators were rushed to a nearby hospital and are in stable condition. Mary Landrieu who flopped her vote in the end had to have stitches.

Sen. Arlen Specter (R-PA) was the lone Republican to vote with the Dems. He was spared from attack.

Spookes -Poose of Pooses for Peace, Zevo Calamari issued this statement after the debate "Thanks to these brave cats and their pet humans calling their Senators, we've been successful in preventing the Senate from passing a wiretapping bill that grants retroactive immunity to AT&T and Verizon.

We at FOX NEWS believe that Zevo and her cohorts are Anti-American and are helping the terrorists with their actions. OUCH what the #!*K! Was I just bit? Someone get me a band aide...............

Last night's State of the Union was disrupted with hundreds of screams and sneezing through out the night. Though, no one was able to see what was actually biting them or causing allergic reactions through the Senate, authorities believe it was the work of the Special Forces Division of the Bite Patrol. Several Senators were covered in cat fur following the speech. No reports as of yet whether President Bush or Dick Cheney have been bit. However both were sneezing while being whisked away immediately after the speech to a secure location.

Secret Service is looking into this biological warfare incident.

In other DC news there are unconfirmed rumors of a secret party at the National Gallery of Art.

2008-01-28

Sharpen Your Teeth!

Fellow Bite Patrol Volunteers.....today is the day. Will we permit this chimp to take away our freedoms? Sharpen your teeth.... Soon we go into battle. ...........

Thanks to those who nagged urged Senators Clinton and Obama to come back to work and vote against McConnell's cloture vote on the Intelligence Committee's pro-telco amnesty FISA bill, they will make a guest appearance and should be spared from being bit today.

However... our work is cut out for us. Here is the list of Senators who think it is ok for the Chimp to illegally spy on you and your pet humans... and they are willing to give immunity to those telecom companies for helping. Have your pet humans call these folks and demand they vote NO for on McConnell's cloture vote and NO more spying !
These Senators should be warned to wear armor if they do not comply!
  • Bayh (202) 224-5623
  • Carper (202) 224-2441
  • Inouye (202) 224-3934
  • Johnson (202) 224-5842
  • Landrieu (202)224-5824 BIT EXTRA HARD! SOLD OUT TO THE TELECOMS
  • McCaskill (202) 224-6154
  • Mikulski (202) 224-4654
  • Nelson (FL) (202) 224-5274
  • Nelson (NE) (202) 224-6551 BIT! SOLD OUT TO THE TELECOMS
  • Pryor (202) 224-2353 BIT! SOLD OUT TO THE TELECOMS
  • Salazar (202) 224-5852
For up to date info on the battle go to firedoglake.com

Tonight Special Bite and Run Forces will be covering the State of the Union. There will be a party afterwards at the National Gallery of Art with plenty of nip-tinis, tequila and ham!

May the Force be with you!

2008-01-27

Nubi wan Kenobi, Chosen Bodyguard for Chey!

Honored i am, chosen i have been. Protect Cheysuli i shall. New Ray-Bans will me she give? The ham enjoy you did?

May the Force with you!
general nubi wan kenobi
jedi poose
New Body Guard to Presidential Candidate Cheysuli



Thanks for taking hiring him Chey! The ham is in the mail. I never thought just offering a ham would be the easiest way to ship him off somewhere else!

Just a reminder to all pooses who have recently volunteered for The Bite Patrol Brigade:
Monday we will need reinforcements.
We have the FISA bill debate and later we will be sending in special forces for the last State of the Union address by the Decider Chimp.

Please be in full uniform. Sharpen your claws and teeth.
Plenty of tequila and Listerine will be provided for that nasty taste!
Party afterwards at the National Gallery of Art.
ciao ciao
zevo calamari

p.s. HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Boo's pet human!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and Happy Birthday to Keith Olbermann ! xoxoxoxo


2008-01-26


CNN BREAKING NEWS

Yesterday during the FISA debate in the Senate, hundreds of cats along with a black lab and one shepherd puppy ran through the aisles biting and scratching Senators Harry Reid, Diane Feinstein and numerous other senators who voted to let the government snoop on Americans illegally. (To see if your senator was bit click on www.irregulartimes.com)

Also bit by another patrol of cats in South Carolina were Senators Clinton, Obama and McCain. These cats were hissing "Shame on all of you for not showing up to defend our rights! None of you deserve to be the elected." CNN believes these cats are supporters of Presidential Candidate Cheysuli.

Some of the cats were wearing tiaras, all were wearing black leather jackets with a Bite Patrol logo on the back. Unconfirmed sources saw one cat wearing a jedi robe and swinging a light saber. Others reported seeing Dude the Bird Dog, ex-dog of Mike Huckabee in fishnets and a sequined IMPEACH t-shirt. One aide claims to have seen a black shepherd puppy running with the cats.

All Senators were rushed to an undisclosed hospital and are in stable condition. Several senators are missing earrings, watches and blackberries. Capitol Hill authorities believe this attack was led by the Pooses for Peace, friends of Senators Chris Dodd and Russ Feingold.

Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari released a statement after the attack,"Give us liberty...or you get bit! Don't tread on my tiara!..... What earrings? What is this entry "For a good time call...." in this blackberry?"

Security will be tightened for Mondays'showdown in the Senate over the FISA debate.

The Pooses for Peace are urging everyone to please call their congressmen if they care about this important issue.

2008-01-24

Calling ALL Pooses!

URGENT CALL TO ALL POOSES!

We need your help. Chris Dodd needs your help. America needs your help!

We need reinforcements for the Bite & Run Patrol for Friday's showdown in Congress. There are way too many ankles and knees of Senators who want to actually grant immunity to telephone companies for us to bite. (So many ankles.. so little time!)

Facts for you to know!
A Senate filibuster led by Senator Chris Dodd is promised against a bill that would grant immunity from lawsuits against telecommunication companies that participated in the Bush administration's warrantless wiretapping of U.S. citizens. Sen. Christopher Dodd, D-Conn., reiterated his intent to block the Intelligence Committee's version of a renewed surveillance law known as FISA (Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act) if it includes immunity.

The bill is S.2248. There is a competing FISA bill from the Judiciary Committee which does not grant immunity.
An amendment by Sen. Patrick Leahy, D-Vt., which would have stripped immunity from the Judiciary Committee version, was tabled this afternoon, by a vote of 60-34.

The Pooses for Peace will be helping Chris Dodd once again with Bite & Run patrols roaming the aisles of Congress, reminding all those voting to do the right thing... or should we say the bite thing? We invite any poose who would like to be a part of the Bite & Run Brigade to join us in our quest for restoring our liberties. (In the future we will invite other critters to join as suggested by Presidential Candidate Cheysuli. Due to the urgency we do not have time to train them in proper biting techniques.)

If there is a filibuster we will also be helping Senator Dodd field questions and turn pages as he reads from the constitution or George Orwell's 1984.

What can your pet humans do? Well.. they can bug their Senators, pester Harry Reid and ask Hillary and Obama why they are not in DC voting for this important matter. All talk.. no action!

Do you want George Bush and Darth Cheney listening to your phone calls.... reading your emails? If the answer is no.... we need you!

The Pooses for Peace Bite Patrol
Be all that you can bite! We are looking for a few good pooses.

2008-01-23

EMERGENCY SESSION CALLED

Hell hath no fury like a bunch of cats relaxing in George Clooney's Swiss Villa who are called back to the US for an emergency session.

Once again Harry Reid is ready to give immunity to those pesky corporate telecom companies that are illegally spying on US citizens. Seems Harry wants to get out of town for the weekend instead of defending our rights. "We have to finish FISA this week. Everyone should be aware of that point. We have to finish it this week. I know there are important trips people want to take. We have the very important economic conference in Davos that Democrats and Republicans alike would like to go to."

So once again the Pooses for Peace have been called in to help Senator Chris Dodd and Russ Feingold, a few Senators with balls backbone to stand up for what is right. You would think that Harry Reid and Diane Feinstein would remember the last time they tried this stunt.

How can you help? Well in the next few days we will be announcing a plan to expand the Bite Patrol. Thanks to Presidential Candidate Cheysuli , who had an excellent idea concerning this matter. If you are interested please start preparing your resumes.

However immediate action is needed to prevent the illegal spying on US citizens by your phone companies who will be granted immunity if Harry gets his way. Please have your pet humans call their congressmen as well as Harry Reid. "No immunity for telecom companies spying !!"

It is important to be nice, do not threaten with bites... we will take care of that on the floor of Congress!

Contact:
Harry Reid
Phone: 202-224-3542
Fax: 202-224-7327
Toll Free for Nevadans:
1-866-SEN-REID (736-7343)

viva la revolucion'
Pooses for Peace
So many ankles, so little time!

UPDATE! As of Thursday 1-24-08....... to keep tabs on the latest development of the FISA debate and who is who visit www.firedoglake.com

2008-01-22

Safe in Switzerland

Thanks to George Clooney we are resting comfortably and in luxury at his Swiss chalet. The cheese is divine here. George has excellent taste in wine. What a guy. He even ordered special beer for Bubba, Nubi and Sarge. Tonight he will be having a small gathering in our honor. Just a few old friends, Johnny D, Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt without the wretched children or scary wife.

We need to rest and recoup after all that biting in the past few weeks. Rumor has it that Tom Brady is limping, Gisele is missing her diamond earrings and those cheerleaders have been complaining about losing stuff too. What a bunch of babies! Belichick's camera is coming in so handy here.

Not sure how long we can stay with George. We must recover in time to help Senator Chris Dodd again in his fight with Congress against the illegal spying mess. And with the elections, we must continue to be on call for a Bite & Run attack at a moments notice. Miss Lucy Fur will be suing Dr Phil soon and will be on Larry King to tell all.

So many ankles...so little time. It is so hard to be us.
ciao ciao for now

2008-01-20

Bite & Run at Gillette Stadium



ESPN BREAKING NEWS: Bite and Run Attack at Gillette Stadium
Foxborough, MA

In the last few minutes of the New England Patriots vs. San Diego Chargers game, hordes of cats wearing tiaras, one swinging a light saber and a black lab wearing fishnets with a sequined Bridget Moynahan t-shirt ran out onto the field of Gillette Stadium hoping to save the day for the San Diego Chargers. Unfortunately the Chargers still lost.

The victims of this latest Bite & Run attack were Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. In the owner's box, Gisele Bundchen, Brady's stick insect supermodel girlfriend and owner Robert Kraft were also bit. Other bite victims included the Patriot Cheerleaders. All were rushed to the Patriot Medical Center and are being treated for bites and scratches. Patriot fans have been assured that Tom Brady will be healed in time to play in the SuperBowl.

Unconfirmed sources claimed to have seen the cats race out of the stadium to a parked private jet, belonging to George Clooney. However since the witnesses were quite inebriated and had strong Boston accents, ("Dar is a jet paaaked ober da lot wit lots of cats wunning ta it") authorities could not get any useful leads.

Authorities report that several earrings belonging to Gisele and the cheerleaders, as well as a few SuperBowl rings, and Bill Belichick's spying camera are reported missing.

In other breaking news, Dr Phil was also a victim of a Bite & Run attack. Authorities believe it may be the work of Britney Spears.

2008-01-19

Miss Lucy Fur's Statement


Thank you all for your cards, flowers and messages of support. I called George Clooney and he got me out of that horrible snake pit of a hospital. He just smiled at the Wardenlike Charge Nurse and she dreamily opened the locked ward.

Dr Phil is a hack and I need to go to Switzerland to George's chateau to recover. I'm thinking of joining Britney with a law suit against the Philster. Anyone have Gloria Allred's cell phone number??

Judd HAS TO GO! He's already playing with my toys and acting cuddly with everyone. It's disgusting.

HELP!!!!!!!!!!
Miss Lucy Fur

2008-01-18

TODAY ON DR PHIL

Join us today on Dr Phil with special guests Miss Lucy Fur and her new roomie Judd the German Shepherd puppy.

Dr Phil has offered to help Miss Lucy Fur get past this most trying time without medication or another stint in rehab. Lucy Fur had a breakdown last night at Hillcrest's famous Mo's. While swilling margaritas and dancing on table tops with BFF Miss Boo, Lucy started a cat fight with a few of the locals. Screaming "JUDD JUDD JUDD you ruined my life!" She began throwing nachos and taking off her panties. Police were called in and Miss Lucy Fur was taken to the nearest hospital. Her pet humans called Dr Phil for help.

Miss Lucy Fur will talk about how her pet humans betrayed her by allowing Judd to move in without her permission. How the annoying screams of the neighbors "Ohhhhhhhh he is sooooooooooo cute!" disturbs her napping.

Is Lucy heartbroken that Bubba refused to move to San Diego with her? Or is she still in love with the Queen's corgie?

And finally Dr Phil will explore the possibility that Lucy Fur was poisoned in the latest Bite & Run attack on Mitt Romney, thus the real cause of this erratic behavior.

Stay tuned for more............

2008-01-16

MITT BIT


FOX NEWS
BREAKING NEWS FROM MICHIGAN

Moments after Mitt Romney was declared the winner of the Republican primary in Michigan last night, hordes of cats wearing Seamus the dog t-shirts, tiaras and one with a light saber descending upon the ex governor of MA. Unconfirmed sources claim to have seen Dude the Bird dog, former dog of Mike Huckabee wearing fishnets, a tiara and a boa running with the cats.

Mr Romney was rushed to an undisclosed hospital and was being treated for bites and scratches. He was released this morning. At his press conference today he claimed that the cats were unusually large and most probably illegal alien cats or terrorists. He had no comment about the cats wearing t-shirts with his dead dog's photo.

There has been no comment from the Huckabee camp on Dude the Bird Dog's adoption to Liza Minnelli or the rumors of his cross dressing.

No suspects have been named for this latest Bite & Run incident. We at Fox News are positive it is the work of those liberal, heathen cats known as the Pooses for Peace.

Stay tuned.... Next up.... latest photos of Britney Spears in Mexico with a Frida Kahlo uni-brow..................

We would like to thank the Academy......


Wow.... this is our very first award. Thank you Karen Jo at Kitty Limericks for presenting it to us. We would like to thank the Academy, our producers, directors, staff, pet humans, Donatella Versace, Jimmy Choo, Al Gore, and all those pooses who are members of the Pooses for Peace and the Bite and Run Brigade... without you, none of this would have been possible.

Miss Karen Jo said these are the rules to accept this award:

1. You must write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think.

2. Acknowledge this post.

3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote.

4. Go tell your humans to fork over the treats!

So..... we are going to make all those rules optional since some of you have pet humans that work.... and most of you have probably received this award! (also we have an old mac and doing this is hard and time consuming!)

And the blogs that make us think are ... drum roll please.............

Miss Karen Jo again....at Kitty Limericks because we love her limericks and she makes us think!

To Cheysuli for making us think and keeping us informed on kitty politics and her campaign.

To Daisy the Curly Cat because she makes us laugh and keeps us informed on lizards and fashion!

To Mr Chen and Ollie because they think like us!

To the The Meezers for keeping us informed on all the Meezer news.

We would also like to thank the Crooks and Liars blog for keeping us informed on REAL news!

Time for treats! All are invited to the Casino Calamari for a party! Nip-tinis and tuna rolls for all.
xoxxoxoxo

2008-01-13

Seance Tonight!


Join Madame Calamari and Lord Kenobi at midnight tonight for an spooktacular event. Tonight we will contact and invite to our seance the ghost of Mitt Romney's dog, Seamus.

What happened to Seamus you ask? In 1983, Romney's dog made a 12-hour trip from Boston to Ontario in a kennel lashed to the top of the family station wagon.

The Associated Press described it this way: "Seamus expressed his discomfort with a diarrhea attack. When Romney's eldest son, Tagg, and his four brothers complained about the brown runoff down the back windshield, their father quietly pulled the car over, borrowed a gas station hose and sprayed down both the dog and the kennel before returning to the road."

For the record, Romney said Thursday that his dog liked being on the roof. "He scrambled up there every time we went on trips," he said at a campaign stop in Pittsburgh, the AP reported.

We invite Seamus to tell his side of this tail tonight.

Tomorrow night we shall invite the ghost of the poor dog that Mike Huckabee's son murdered while at Boy Scout camp.

Yes, sad but true and you can read about it at thewww.huffingtonpost.com

2008-01-11

Urgent


Pooses..... are your pet humans registered to vote in the primaries? Help make a difference and urge them to register!

You can check to see if you are or register at this site votepoke.org

Of course we are supporting Cheysuli! However humans may have to choose between the lesser qualified candidates.

Rock on......
Pooses for Peace

2008-01-09

Tonight on The Daily Show

Join Jon tonight with his special guests, The Pooses for Peace with Musical guest Neil Young.

It is sure to be a lively conversation with Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari who will talk about the infamous Bite & Run Brigade, the NH primaries, Dude the Bird Dog's coming out and celebrity stick insects who wear fur.

Miss Lucy Fur and Miss Boo will also appear on The Colbert Report after The Daily Show. Nubi wan Kenobi and Bubba will be David Letterman's guest on the Late Show tomorrow night.

2008-01-07

News Flash

Hilary Clinton loses earrings in NH
Mitt Romney loses Rolex watch


What earrings?
What watch?

2008-01-05

It's Little Christmas Eve!


Today is Little Christmas Eve. It is an Italian tradition that children (and pooses) put their shoes or socks out tonight, in hopes that La Befana, a good witch will fill them with treats and gifts. Read more about La Befana at wikipedia.org

We have been extra good pooses (well Bite and Run Patrol runs are good for the country aren't they?) so we will be putting out our Manolos, Choos and Jedi Sandals tonight.

Wishing every one a Happy Little Christmas! Buon Natale!
Gatti per laPace
(cats for peace)

2008-01-04

Today on Oprah


Today on Oprah!

Miss Lucy Fur visits her gal pal Oprah and tells all!

Find out who wore what at the Pooses for Peace New Year's Eve Gala!

Is it true that Bubba and Lucy Fur kissed at midnight?

Get the real scoop on Dude the Bird dog's adoption to Liza Minnelli.

And will Lucy Fur pick a cat fight with Oprah who is supporting Obama and not the Pooses for Peace candidate Cheysuli?

Stay tuned!!!!!!!!!

2008-01-02

Huckabee Declares War on Show Tunes


Breaking Entertainment News!

After giving a stellar performance at the Pooses for Peace New Years Eve Gala, Liza Minelli announced that she was adopting Dude the Bird Dog, the former dog of presidential candidate Mike Huckabee.

Ms Minelli promised that Dude would be much happier in an environment that supported alternative lifestyles and he would be free to wear a tiara, fishnets and sing show tunes.

When asked to comment on his adoption Dude the Bird Dog belted out in song
" Start spreading the news.........."

There has been no comment from the Huckabee camp, however unconfirmed sources report that he is furious and vowed to make singing show tunes illegal once he is president.

After the break on Entertainment Tonight a look at celebrity pooses in red versace at the Pooses for Peace Gala. And was Al Gore really there? Stay tuned!

2008-01-01

Happy 2008!

Wishing you and your love ones a happy and peaceful 2008.

Please give peace a chance!
the pooses for peace

2007-12-31

Happy New Year!


You are all invited to celebrate the beginning of 2008 with us at The Casino Calamari. Our opening act will be will be Liza Minnelli, which was a special request from our newest Pooses for Peace member, Dude the Bird Dog. Bruce and the E Street Band will follow.

Al Gore will do the countdown to 2008 this year. To avoid the paparazzi, we will not make public the other celebrities who are attending

Please hire legal substitute pooses to fill in for you.

We wish you all a very happy 2008. May this coming year bring peace, joy and love!
xoxoxo

2007-12-30

Shocking News for Huckabee

AP
IOWA

More shocking news came yesterday for the Huckabee campaign. Dude, the Bird Dog has formally announced his resignation as Huckabee's hunting partner (who did all the real work anyway). Most upsetting to Mr. Huckabee was that Dude joined The Pooses for Peace an organization which endorses peace, no war and presidential candidate Cheysuli .

In his statement to the press, Dude the Bird Dog said " I am so happy to finally be out of that horrid camouflage gear and those nasty chains. I have admired the work The Pooses for Peace has been doing and proud to be a part of it. After all, isn't that what Jesus would do? Oh... do you think they will give me my own tiara? I do hope that Zevo keeps her promise and invites Liza Minneli to the New Years Eve Bash."

There has been no comment by the Huckabee campaign.

2007-12-29

BREAKING NEWS


FOX NEWS
BREAKING NEWS FROM IOWA

Presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee is the latest victim of a Bite & Run attack.

The former Arkansas governor, surprised the rest of GOP field with his front-runner status here, was the first candidate to hold an event the day after Christmas. Surrounded by about a dozen reporters, as he went shooting, with Dude, his 3-year-old bird dog, and two friends, at his side.

In the first half hour, Huckabee, and friends shot three birds. Their last shot flew over the heads of reporters.

Moments later Huckabee and friends were attacked by several cats wearing tiaras, black leather and one holding a light saber. All three men are in stable condition at an undisclosed hospital. Dude the bird dog was seen leaving with the cats.

Unconfirmed sources report this is the work of the infamous Pooses for Peace Bite and Run Brigade.

Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari issued a statement following the accusation. " It was imperative to bring attention to the American people that voting for Huckabee is like putting Elmer Fudd in the White House. Could some one please bring me a shot of tequila, i have the most putrid taste in my mouth"

2007-12-28

My pet human is gone for a few more days. I decided to stay here in San Diego instead of visiting Zevo in Salem for Christmas...it is way too cold there. Of course she is begging me to come to the New Years Eve party at the Casino Calamari. I suppose i should since i am part owner.

I will have to talk Miss Lucy Fur into coming with me. She has a knack for stealing borrowing those poose sized miniature liquor samples they use on the plane. Poor Lucy is back on her meds. Her pet humans are getting.... a German Shepherd puppy soon. The nerve of them. (Of course Zevo does not know this but i heard a rumor her pet humans are also thinking about getting one.) Hope this is not an epidemic. My pet human knows better than to even think about such a thing.

Hmmm..........I wonder if Donatella will loan me a few outfits for the trip? I read that wearing Versace on New Years Eve brings good fortune for the new year.

Time to nap in the SoCal sun.........
xoxoxoxo
Boo

2007-12-26

Happy Boxing Day!

Out of all the wonderful toys, gifts and trinkets we received for Christmas... this ribbon was our favorite!

Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. We will be napping for the next few days...... must rest up for the New Years Eve Gala at Casino Calamari!

Of course all pooses are invited. We will announce the special guests later this week. Until then catch up on your naps.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

2007-12-24

December 25th, 2007


Madonna and Zevo
by Raphael

At the Louvre
Paris France


We wish you all a Merry Christmas
and a
Happy Birthday Jimmy Buffett!

2007-12-23

A Festivus for the Rest of Us!



We will be celebrating Festivus tonight at The Casino Calamari. The erecting of the pole will be at 7:00 pm. The reading of grievances will be followed by the Feats of Strength. The entire Seinfeld cast will be our special guests.

Here are a few excerpts from the list of grievances:

We want a full time staff member to post on our blog and visit other pooses blogs every day.

Our catnip needs are not met here.
All of us!


We want more stinky junk food not this organic crap they keep insisting we eat.
zevo and nubi

More birdie toys and a new light saber or else.
nubi wan kenobi

We insist on more Versace, Jimmy Choo and Manolos.
zevo, boo and lucy fur

We demand more Natty Boh, hon.
Also why does the new baby with the big feet get all the attention now?
tao and sarge

I am tired of being blamed for all those missing earrings.
miss boo

I am over taking those meds.
miss lucy fur

I demand more wicker to chew on and more beer.
bubba


Pooses for Peace List of Grievances:

Why hasn't Dick Cheney been impeached?
click here to help impeach him!

Selfish Chimp in the White House.

Spineless democrats giving the chimp more money for a war.

Loss of our civil rights.

Walmart, McDonalds and Fox News.

Celebrities who wear fur.... well anyone who wears a dead animal for the sake of fashion.

Why can't humans just be nice to one another and stop all the fighting?

2007-12-21

It's Party TIme!


Join us for the entire weekend at Casino Calamari! With the money we made selling those diamond earrings on Ebay um i mean... shoveling snow all week.... there will be plenty of nip, margaritas and tasty stinky food for all!

Tonight we will celebrate Solstice by decorating our tree and a few ceremonial dances. Pagan pooses are welcome to join in this festivity.

We will also be celebrating end of Zappadan
Yes it is a real holiday! For all of those who are not familiar with this holiday it begins on December 4th and ends on Frank Zappa's birthday December 21st. (Frank passed away on December 4, 1993..and our pet human took it very hard since it was her birthday)

Sunday we will have our annual Festivus party. Please bring your list of grievances. The erecting of the Pole will start at 7:00 pm followed by the Feats of Strengths.

Remember to hire legal poose substitutes. We don't need that pesky Lou Dobbs bad mouthing us again on CNN!

Happy Solstice!
Merry Zappadan!

2007-12-20

shhhhhhhhhh.............

What earrings? What are you talking about? Diane WHOstein? huh?

I am under here because i am very busy and important. Now go away and do not tell anyone you saw me. Oh.... while you are here how about bringing me some nip and a tuna roll.....

xoxoxo
Miss Boo

2007-12-19

Feinstein Loses Telecom Earrings


Senator Diane Feinstein has called for an investigation on the whereabouts of the diamond hooped earrings she wore during Senator Dodd's filibuster on Monday. Unconfirmed sources report that the earring were a gift from a Telecom corporation.

The Senator is also demanding that The Pooses for Peace replace the plus size Leggs Control-top pantyhose that she also wore that day.

Pooses for Peace Spookes-poose issued a statement, "What earrings? What pantyhose?"

In other related DC news:

A brief fire broke out Wednesday morning inside the Eisenhower Executive Office Building, which is adjacent to the White House, but no one was injured and the fire was contained.

Firefighters were forced to break windows in the historic building. It appeared that several offices were gutted on the second floor near the ceremonial office of the vice president, but the fire did not appear to have spread to other floors.
Vice President Dick Cheney was not in the building at the time of the fire.

Firefighters found tequila bottles and cuban cigars in the room the fire started. No suspects have been named.

2007-12-18

VICTORY...for now


Chris Dodd thanks the Pooses for Peace
Bite & Run Brigade

Sen. Dodd’s courageous FISA filibuster stand-off yesterday was a victory. Harry Reid pulled the Telecom immunity off the table.... for now.

Unconfirmed sources over heard that Harry Reid was terrified of the number of cats running through the Senate chambers during the filibuster nipping at ankles, knees and fingers. Diane Feinstien left the chambers with several runs and holes in her stockings.

Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari released a statement after the filibuster, "We intend to be persistent in protecting the basic civil rights of the citizens of the United States. Could someone please get me a shot of tequila to get this awful taste out of my mouth? Diane Feinstien was wearing cheap perfume..... bluuuuuuaaaakk...."

In his closing speech Dodd vowed to filibuster again in January if telecom amnesty is still part of the FISA legislation. He also promised to make the Pooses for Peace Bite and Run Brigade a part of the next filibuster.

We woudl like to thank all the pooses who volunteered for Bite and Run duty. For all the pet humans who called their Senators about this matter we thank you. We will keep you posted on this matter.

Viva la revolucion'
The Pooses for Peace

2007-12-17

Emergency Session of Poose Congress Called

An emergency session of Poose Congress was called today in order to aid Senator Chris Dodd on his filibuster of the FISA/telecom immunity act, after Harry Reid turned to the dark side to allow a debate to grant telecom companies immunity for illegally spying on US citizens. The cats will help field questions to Senator Dodd and turn pages for him as he reads the constitution.

The Pooses for Peace will also attend the session. These cats will aid Senator Dodd with Bite and Run patrols to insure that he succeeds.

The Pooses for Peace have already issued a warning to Harry Reid, "No immunity for those telecom companies that illegally spied on us...... or else!" Senator Reid has not commented on this threat.

If your pet humans are concerned about the illegal spying on US citizens and do not want the telecom companies to get away with it... have them call their senators to support Chris Dodd. Click on www.thankyoudodd.com for more info.

2007-12-16

Jimmy Buffett Snowed In at Casino Calamari

AP
Salem, MA

Unconfirmed sources report that Jimmy Buffett is snowed in at the Casino Calamari in Salem , MA due to a Nor-easter that hit New England late Saturday Night.

Salem Police have been called in due to the loud singing and noise coming from the Casino. Cats wearing coconut bras, grass skirts and leis invited the police to join the party. Mayor Kimberly Driscoll denies all reports of Salem Police drinking margaritas and sporting grass skirts. At this time the music and noise continues. Police cars are still parked outside the Casino.

Sing along with Jimmy and the Coral Poose Reefer Band

Boat drinks
Boys in the band ordered boat drinks
Visitors scored on the home rink
Everything seems to be wrong

Lately, newspaper mentioned cheap air fare
I gotta to fly to saint somewhere
Im close to bodily harm

Twenty degrees and the hockey games on
Nobody cares they are way too far gone
Screamin boat drinks, something to keep em all warm

This mornin, I shot six holes in my freezer
I think I got cabin fever
Somebody sound the alarm

Id like to go where the pace of lifes slow
Could you beam me somewhere mr. scott?
Any ol place here on earth or in space
You pick the century and Ill pick the spot

Oh I know, (I know)
I should be leaving this climate
I got a verse but cant rhyme it
I gotta go where its warm

Boat drinks
Waitress I need two more boat drinks
Then Im headin south fore my dream shrinks

I gotta go where its warm (I gotta go where its warm)
I gotta go where its warm (I gotta go where its warm)
I gotta go where its warm!

I gotta go where there aint any snow
Where there aint any blow
cause my fin sinks so low
I gotta go where its warm

2007-12-15

Baby it's cold outside!

This is the view from our back window. We are going to stay in this weekend and nap. More snow and ice is on its way.

So happy we stocked up on nip, tequila and margarita mix............I think i saw a polar bear in the back yard........

Sing along with Jimmy Buffett "Waitress i need two more boat drinks."

xoxoxoox

2007-12-12

BITE & RUN PATROL STRIKES OLSEN TWINS

Associated Press
New York, New York

Today hordes of cats dressed in black leather, some wearing tiaras, and one in a Jedi robe with light saber descended upon the Olsen twins while they were walking down Fifth Avenue wearing fur, drinking Red Bulls and smoking. The shrills of skinny girls shrieking filled Manhattan. Although there was not much to bite, the stick insects twins were rushed to a nearby hospital and are said to be in stable condition. One was seen munching on tic tacs for dinner.

Spokes poose of The Bite & Run Brigade, Zevo Calamari has sent out a warning to all celebrities who wear fur that they may be next.

In another related story about the Olsen Twins:

PETA has created a new campaign, singling out "Trollsen Twins" Hairy-Kate and Trashley as Animal Kingdom Enemies Number One for wearing pelts and including 'em in their collections Elizabeth and James and the Row.

"No one would argue that Mary-Kate and Ashley could use some meat on their bones, but the last thing they need is hair on their backs," PETA's Assistant Director of Youth Campaigns Dan Shannon said in a statement released today.


2007-12-11

Ok.... so we are being petition pests this week. Not only do the Pooses for Peace care about Peace..but we also care about our friends the Polar Bears. Please help them by having your pet humans sign the card that is being sent to the White House. We need so many more signatures to make a difference.

Help give polar bears the gift of a future on our planet by signing this Holiday SOS Card to President Bush in support of their protection under the Endangered Species Act.

Please add your name to the card right now -- www.nrdconline.org
because the polar bear can't wait. Within the next 30 days, the Bush Administration will either throw polar bears a lifeline -- or condemn them to extinction.

Without urgently needed protection, all of Alaska's polar bears could be extinct in less than 50 years -- along with two-thirds of the world's entire polar bear population.

But there is still hope if the Bush Administration takes action now.

That's why we are asking you -- and everyone who cares about polar bears -- to help us add 100,000 signatures to this Polar Bear Holiday SOS Card. When you do, you'll be sending President Bush a message loud and clear during this holiday season: Save Polar Bears Now!

All we are saying is GIVE POLARS BEARS A CHANCE!
Pooses for Peace

2007-12-09

URGENT

Yesterday was the anniversary of the death of John Lennon. In memory of his words "GIVE PEACE A CHANCE" we have posted this urgent message.

As you have probably figured out by now we are a progressive cat blog dedicated to promoting peace. We are urging all of you to ask your pet humans to read this important information and email their Senators concerning it. Together we can make a difference.

FROM THE PDA:

As most members of the Senate and the House are preparing to celebrate the birth of the Prince of Peace with their loved ones, they are about to vote to fund more death and destruction.

In a complete capitulation to Bush and the Republican war machine, Congress is expected to vote on Monday, December 10, to approve continued funding for the occupation of Iraq with NO STRINGS ATTACHED!

We're fed up.

Though time is short, peace activists are mobilizing to make our voice heard yet again. Choose which works best for you and your district from the following tactics and please, act quickly:
Send an email to your senators and representative that says “Peace is Possible, if you vote NO.
CLICK HERE!

• Flood both your senators and representatives with phone calls through the Capitol Hill switchboard (202-224-3121) with this message: “Vote NO to any funding for the occupation of Iraq that does not require the rapid withdrawal of all U.S. troops and contractors.”


Perhaps it will take the ROAR of Pooses for Peace for Congress to wake up!
All we are saying... is give peace a chance!


2007-12-07

Bill O'Reilly Bit!


O’Reilly: Progressive blog readers = ‘devil worshippers.’

On Fox News yesterday, Bill O’Reilly let loose on “far-left websites” like DailyKos, stating, “If you read these far-left websites, you’re a devil worshipper. You are.” O’Reilly’s ombudsman responded, “As a journalist, you know better than that.” O’Reilly shot back: “Satan is running the DailyKos. Yes, he is! and Satan is also behind the blog The Adventures of Zevo Calamari and Boo. Those cats certainly are devil worshipping liberal heathens. "

After Bill O announced his lists of devil worshipping blogs, he claims that a herd of cats wearing black leather, rhinestoned devil horns and carrying pitchforks attacked him. Unconfirmed sources report that Mr O'Reilly is in stable condition at an undisclosed hospital.

There is no word on who the suspects are yet. Cameras at Fox were turned off right before the attack.
FOX NEWS has reported it is the work of the Pooses for Peace Bite and Run Brigade. Authorities are still investigating the Bite & Run attack on Rudy Giuliani earlier in the week.




2007-12-06

Back in San Diego

It is good to be back in San Diego. Salem was getting much too cold for me. I do not know how Zevo and Nubi tolerate it.

There were so many parties these past few weeks. I look a little ragged. So i am taking a few days off to catch up on my reading and beauty rest. Miss Lucy Fur and i may go to the Golden Door Spa later this week for a spa day. The holidays are just around the corner and we want to look extra beautiful for all those parties.

Oh.... my organic catnip tea is here.
Ciao ciao,
boo

2007-12-05

Whew! Once again it was such a fun party. My pet human had a great birthday. Doing shots of Strega with Steve Martin was a hoot! He can sure play a mean banjo. (We hid our pet human's banjo so she would not be tempted to play along!)

Today is Walt Disney's birthday. Our pet human insisted that i wear these mouse ears in honor of her hero. ..ahhhh the things we do to make our humans happy!

M I C see ya real soon
K E Y why? because we like you
M O U S E
xoxox
nubi

2007-12-04

YOU ARE INVITED
to

princess calamari's

Surprise Birthday Bash


at
CASINO CALAMARI
tonight 8 pm-?

special guest
Steve Martin

Wine and Strega shots
Niptinis


2007-12-03

Back to Earth


Whew! We are so hung over........What a great party. Thanks to all who attended. You all looked fabulous and who knew that all of you could dance so well to Ewok music?

Zevo wore her Princess Leia slave girl outfit. Boo wore a versace space suit and looked stunning even though she left her Jimmy Choos back on Earth. We were happy that Miss Lucy Fur is back on her meds and was the hit of the party. Bubba is such a lady's man.... what a flirt. Tao and Sarge were kind enough to bring cases of Natty Boh in case we ran out of Coronas.

Thank you for all the gifts and birthday wishes. We need to nap and recover from the space travel and the tequila. Tomorrow is our pet human's birthday and we are planning a surprise party for her at the Casino Calamari. Steve Martin will be performing. You are all invited. This time we will be serving wine and shots of Strega.

Oh... for those of you who attended her party last year please note that we hid her banjo so she will not annoy us play it.

Could someone turn out the lights and bring us some ginger ale and asprin?

2007-12-02

Happy Birthday Nubi wan Kenobi


From the Forest Moon of Endor.......
This party is out of this world!

May the Force be with you!

2007-12-01

BREAKING NEWS.....

This just in the CNN SITUATION ROOM ......

A spaceship resembling The Millennium Falcon was seen taking off over Nevada's Area 51 early this morning.
An tourist has claimed to have seen two droids, a wookie and hordes of cats wearing tiaras, jedi robes and carrying light sabers boarding the ship before take off. Some were carrying cases of Corona beer and Jose Cuervo.

The US Air Force denies that any activity has taken place at Area 51. The tourist who reported the incident has been taken to a detention facility for interrogation mental hospital for treatment.

Rumors are flying around the blog-o-sphere that the infamous Pooses for Peace Bite & Run Brigade were off to a birthday party for Jedi Poose, Nubi wan Kenobi which will be held on the forest moon of Endor.

OUR NEXT STORY.....Authorities are still searching for clues on the Bite & Run attack on Presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani yesterday.
Stay tuned.....