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BREAKING NEWS...... Sen Bunning latest victim of a Bite & Run as he blocked a measure that would extend cash and health insurance benefits for the unemployed.

Throughout the day Tuesday, Democrats had been threatening to keep the Senate open all night, a move that would have forced Bunning to remain on the floor if he wanted to continue to block the measure.

With hundreds of thousands of people expected to lose benefits this week, Democrats have spent the past several days holding up the impasse as an example of Republican attempts to block Democratic legislation. The Democratic National Committee blasted 16 e-mails to reporters on Tuesday decrying Bunning's blockade.

In an unexpected turn of events, a horde of cats wearing tiaras, one donning a Jedi robe and swinging a light saber and a dog wearing a Che beret rushed on to the Senate floor. Screams and sneezes filled the room. Hair pieces flew through the air. Within minutes the cats had vanished without a trace and Senator Bunning and a few other senators were immediately rushed to an undisclosed hospital. All remain in stable condition. However it is reported that a cat wearing scrubs ran off with their pain medication. Many senators are now reporting that their iPhones, credit cards and watches are missing.

Authorities believe this is the work of the infamous domestic liberal terrorist group known as the Pooses for Peace.

No charges have been filed as of this time. There will be a press conference at 11:00 pm.


zevo hussein calamari said...

ack ack blaaaaaaaaa ucckkkk... the taste of cheap after shave combined with greed lingers in my mouth.. give me a hit of that tequila!

Anonymous said...

this iphone has some great numbers in it.....
nubi wan kenobi

The Meezers and Billy said...

what is vi-co-din? - Miles

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Well it's about time someone shut them down. Harry Reid doesn't have the Bazongas to do it.

Boo said...

Gag me! The taste of this guy is almost enough to convince me to go vegetarian!