Zevo Calamari and her friends have traveled the world partying with the glitteratti, consorting with the pooseratti and adding a whole new dimension to the the term cat burglar.
Now known as the Pooses For Peace, these feline celebrities add a bite to the political arena of the USA!
We would like to thank everyone for their kind words of love and all the calls, emails, facebook and blog comments during this sad time. I am sorry i cannot respond to each comment on your individual blogs at this time as my ibook passed away the same week Zevo left us. I believe she took it to the afterlife with her.
We decided it was for the best to release Zevo's last will and testament concerning the Pooses for Peace, the Bite and Run Brigades, and her various businesses, especially so close to the election.
We hope to see you at Zevo's memorial service at the Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris and after the party at the Moulin Rouge. Thanks again for all the love.
Zevo's Pet Humans
Zevo Marie hussein Calamari's
Last Will and Testament
My dear friends,
If you are reading this, then it is certain that i have passed away or faked my death to hide on a remote island. In either case i request the following:
May the Pooses for Peace be overseen by it's original founders, Mizz Boo and Mizz Lucy Fur. I request that Nubi wan Kenobi, Luna miso Poosie, Miss Smudgie, Chez Hussein Monkay, Che Nikki, Quan Yin Kali Wu and Cheysuli be on the board of directors of the Pooses for Peace. You may add more directors as needed.
You will continue to battle corruption, greed, stupidity and expose those who are guilty of such things. The Pooses for Peace will be directly in charge of planning covert Bite & Run attacks whenever necessary. And you will also be in charge of celebrating every holiday in the proper Pooses for Peace manner! (It would be lovely if you continued tormenting the Mayor of Salem, especially during Halloween.) I ask in the name of fashion that Tiaras and Top Hats be worn when possible.
Concerning the Bite & Run Brigades:
Jedi Poose Nubi wan Kenobi and General hussein Monkay will lead all covert activities along with all those special coop agents who we shall not name. You poose spies know who you are! I ask the fashionable Miss Daisy to design new uniforms and berets when needed.
The Poop and Run and the Poot & Run brigades will be led by the infamous Meezer Boys, Sammy, Miles and Nicholas along with our dear Agent Poopalina.
The Natty Bo Brigade will be lead by Bubba, Sarge, Tao, Stoli, Summer, Max the wonder dog and Miss BeagliEtta.
The Texas Brigade run by Ethel and Guinness.
The Merry Ole Brigade shall be run by our friends the Royal Corgies and their 007 spies.
The Calamari Business Empire
Brothel Calamari shall be run by Madam Lucy Fur along with Miss Boo. Business as usual girls.
Casino Calamari shall be run by Nubi wan Kenobi and Luna Miso Poosie. I beseech you not to invite Charo back no matter how much she begs.
Cinema Calamari shall be managed by Miss Smudge and all those pooses who live with Cheysuli, Gemini and Ichiro.
The Zevo Calamari Institute of Professional Biting shall be run by the Bite and Run Brigade members and used as a training camp for young pooses who want to serve.
Planet Calamari Art Galleria
I have decided to remain the CEO of Planet Calamari Art Galleria and give my pet human advice from the afterlife (or remote island). She will still remain the in-house artist but will give me full credit for designing the new line of feline jewelry that i designed.
I leave my great fortune to the Pooses for Peace. Although my pet humans need that money, i worry that the IRS or Homeland Security would snap it up if it were left to them. Forgive me dear pet humans for this blunder. I do leave my pet humans various pieces of art and sculptures which i shall not list and my wine cellar.
My tiara collection will be donated to the Smithsonian Museum. However the emerald tiara really does belong to Mizz Boo, and the Ruby tiara to Mizz Lucy Fur and so they shall be given back to their rightful owners. You both can split my wardrobe and give a few things to Miss Smudgie and Luna miso Poosie.
I also would like to give Bono back his sunglasses. I never really sold them on ebay. George Clooney, i give you permission to date again.
Thank you all for being such wonderful friends. I love you all so much. You have made my life complete. I promise to send messages from the afterlife.
Tears poured out around the world when the news of Zevo hussein Calamari's sudden passing broke this morning. President Obama has ordered the flags to be flown half mast for the rest of the week.
Zevo hussein Calamari, infamous cat burglar, domestic terrorist and one of the
founders of the Pooses for Peace, passed away today at the age of 19.5 years. Born in Escondido California, and was named after Miss Zevo in the movie TOYS, Zevo was a celebrity feline, friend of dignitaries, the Dalai Lama, rock stars and the glitteratti.
She and her cohorts were the force behind the covert Bite & Run brigades known to attack dim witted politicians, stick insect models that wear fur and the Mayor of Salem in her ill fitting black suit. The list of victims attacked during the Bite & Run operations include many of those who served the GW Bush administration, congress, Karl Rove, Dick Cheney, the Bush Twins, FOX NEWS Newscasters, P Diddy, Linsey Lohan, Britney Spears, all of George Clooney's girlfriends, Johnny Depp's ex-wife, and way too many others to list.
Zevo was a successful business poose who owned Brothel Calamari, Casino Calamari, Cimema Calamari along with Planet Calamari Art Galleria.
She is survived by her pet humans, Princess Calamari and the Magician, her bodyguard Jedi knight Nubi wan Kenobi and prima ballerina Luna Miso Poosie and the d-o-g, Quan Yin Kali Wu.
She has requested in her last will and testament that her dear friends Miss Lucy Fur, Nubi wan Kenobi, Luna Miso, take over the Pooses for Peace. The Bite & Run Brigades will be under the direction of her dear friends, M hussein Monkay, Cheysuli, the Meezers gang and Che Nikki.
A private service will be held for the friends and family of Zevo over the weekend. The Dalai Lama will preside over the ceremony. It is her wish that her ashes be spread over the Moulin Rouge in Paris and the Pacific Ocean.
Cinema Calamari will be showing the movie TOYS all week. Casino Calamari will be holding a wake in her honor. Margarita fountains, all you can eat buffet and a star studded celebrity list of musicians will be among the performers.
Thanks to all those pooses who have been friends and rebels with our dear Zevo. She will be missed.
THIS JUST IN .... An exclusive report brought to you by FOX NEWS, the fair and balanced news station that everyone(with an IQ of 50 or below believes.)
Unconfirmed sources have reported that Mitt Romney and his running mate Paul Ryan were victims of a Bite and Run attack an hour ago while on the campaign trail. Hordes of cats, a few dogs, a lone wolf and a few skunks invaded the Romney Campaign bus and bit all on board while chanting "Show us your tax returns!" A dog wearing a Che Guevara beret bit Romneyon the buttocks shouting "That was for Seamus. Next time we will strap you to the roof of our bus!"
The bus driver survived with the least amount of injuries. He claims that most of the cats were wearing tiaras, some berets, and one was dressed as a Jedi knight complete with cape and light saber.
Screams and sneezes were heard miles away from the attack. A bio-hazard unit was brought in to remove the stench from the bus. Mrs. Romney reports that not only was her designer blouse that cost a mere $10,000 torn, but her watch, earrings and Gucci handbag are now missing. The most horrifying part of it all was that a cat turd was found in her up-do.
All victims were taken to an undisclosed hospital and are in stable condition. A nurse claims that a cat wearing scrubs and a tiara came into the hospital and switched the pain killer medication with Flintstone vitamins. The nurse and the bus driver are now on medical leave until they pass a psychiatric evaluation.
No comment has been issued by the Romney campaign at this time. Authorities believe this was the work of the infamous liberal domestic terrorist group known as the Pooses for Peace run by feline celebrity Zevo hussein Calamari and her cohorts. This dangerous pack of cats have been laying low for quite some time. Speculation was that the cats retired and were living on a remote island with Captain Jack Sparrow while hiding from the CIA, FBI, IRS and Homeland Security. The rebel cats are known for biting political pundits, mostly Republican politicians, stick insect models that wear fur and for sport, the mayor of Salem MA.
No one has seen Mizz Calamari for quite some time. Some believe she roams the streets of Washington DC in disguise conducting her covert activities and planning for more Bite & Runs closer to the election. Others claim she has retired and passed on the reign of power to her bodyguard and Jedi Knight, Sir Nubi wan Kenobi.
In other news....
Earlier today in Washington DC authorities at the National Gallery of Art reported that several Monet paintings were missing when the museum opened. Security cameras seemed to have been taped up with masking tape and cat hair. The FBI has now taken over the crime investigation and refuses to offer any more details until the paintings are discovered.
The Pooses for Peace have released a tape with Zevo Calamari who appears to on a beach. "Mitt Who? Where is the National Art Gallery? Does this Gucci bag make me look fat? Ack ack someone hand me that bottle of Pastis... the taste of stupidity and greed are making me gag, gag.... ack... Oh Capt Jack could you hang that painting in the bedroom please......"