Planet Calamari Zazzle shop


Salem, MA
Thousands of tourists, hordes of cats and celebrities have been flooding into Salem the past few days to celebrate Halloween.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll has called for police reinforcements from surrounding cities for tonight. Extra security has also been brought in for the Annual Poose Witch Ball. This event is invitation only. Invitees are picked by the celebrity cats known as the Gatti della Strega (the Witch Cats). Last year the mayor was said to have fainted at the sight of Captain Jack Sparrow and claims her earrings were stolen by the cats.

This year the mayor was not invited . When asked why the mayor was snubbed, Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari replied "She can go hang out at that tacky carnival with those carnies that she forced on the city of Salem. Afterwards she can watch the fireworks over the wrecking yard."

Unconfirmed sources have reported seeing George Clooney , Julia Roberts and the cast of the Rocky Horror Show dining at In A Pig's Eye. Nicole Kidman and Sandra Bullock were spotted shopping at The Cat, The Crow, and The Crown, run by the official witch of Salem, Laurie Cabot . Oprah and her entourage bought several bottles of Castano wine at Pamplemouse. The remaining cast of Bewitched, led by Doctor Bombay was seen in a chartered Salem Red Trolley Tour Bus on the way to the House of Seven Gables.


Salem Haunted Happenings

Salem, Massachusetts
Haunted Happenings Event Schedule

Strega Zevo Calamari will be reading paws and the tarot every night at the Hawthorne Hotel in the haunted room. Please call for reservations. Strega Zevo Calamari is known as the psychic to the stars and has consulted with celebrities, diplomats and royalty. (Unfortunately some of those such as Britney Spears, Rosie O'Donnell and the mayor of Salem have not heeded her warnings of crash and burn syndrome.)

Madam Booooooooooo will be conducted ghost tours through out Salem each evening at 9pm. Only the brave of heart should dare to walk with her as she takes you through the graveyards, haunted houses and the finale.... the House of the Seven Gables to meet the ghost of Nathaniel Hawthorne.

Nubi Wan Kenobi, The official Black Cat of Salem will be signing autographs at the Witch Museum daily. Bubba the cat will be performing magic tricks also.

Join The Countess Lucy Fur On the haunted tall ship
The Friendship for an evening of spook-tac-ular ghost stories.

Visit Tao and Sarge's Natty Boh and Tuna cake stand in The Salem Commons for a tasty treat.

The Annual Poose Witch Ball
will be held at The Casino Calamari
on Halloween Night from 10pm- ?
Costumes are mandatory. Call 1-800-boo-zevo for tickets.

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop



It is mandatory that we all dress in costume for the next week since we live in Salem, MASS.

I wanted to thank everyone for their prayers and purrs for all our friends in Southern California. Our pet humans are relieved that their families and loved ones are all safe... and that is all that matters right now.

We are sorry we have not been able to visit everyones' blogs. We were glued to the KPBS site waiting for news of the fires.

Boo and Lucy Fur are safe and flew in from San Diego last night and they are both here at the Casino Calamari for our Halloween Gala. Bubba is flying in from Florida this weekend and Tao and Sarge will also join us. The party starts tonight and ends on midnight November 1.

All pooses are invited. Costumes are mandatory!
bring your own nip

Zevo Calamari
aka Countess Von Poosula

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Send in the Rain

We have decided to take matters into our own paws. .... and have hired a Native American to dance the rain dance for southern California.

Visualize rain. Nap for rain. Pray for rain.

We need a miracle.....NOW!

Sending healing thoughts to all who are in Southern California.

zevo and The Pooses for Peace

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Calling from Dante's Inferno

Zevo..... please call me, but use the landline since the cell phones are not working here. My pet human will not let me outside. She said it is too dangerous.

Most of San Diego is burning down and the fire drives coyotes into the city. It looks like the end of the world. .....this is scary stuff.

I am so worried about all the animals who have not been evacuated. And i am really worried about all those poor pooses at the Wild Animal Park. Please have everyone send good thoughts and purrs to all in need.

Poor Lucy Fur and i were supposed to go shopping today..... i guess the malls are closed too. Maybe you can get us a red-eye flight to Salem for the weekend? We would rather be there with you celebrating Halloween than burning in hell.

Pray for rain. Pray for snow.

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


My pet human is walking today in the Save the Ta Ta's Walk. ...well that is what her pink shirt said. I am so proud of her. She has been very brave these past few months. I am a lucky poose to have such a great pet human....even if she does scream at me when i chew the wicker chairs.

Sending healing purrs and lots of pink sparkles today


Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Napping for World Peace

In honor of the His Holiness, The Dali Lama being awarded a Congressional Gold Medal we will are calling pooses around the world to Nap for World Peace today.


Pooses for Peace

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Cat's Bill of Rights

Boo asked that we post this!

Cats are animals (who) know what their rights are.
-Eli Khamorov

I am the cat, & I have certain inalienable rights:
I have the right to walk over your face anytime I wish, day or night.
I have the right to observe & comment on any & all bathroom behavior.
Further, I have the right to be highly offended by any closed door.
I have the right to smell your shoes to determine if you have been fraternizing
or cavorting or frolicking with any highly questionable animals.
I have the right to assist in any food preparation, cooking, cleaning, or eating
event that may occur in the home.
I have the right to wake you at 3:00 in the morning if I find my food dish is not
to my satisfaction.
I have the right to tip over any water container I deem unsuitable for
I have the right to curse at squirrels & birds that may dare to pass my
I have the right to inspect any grocery items that come into the home. Further,
I have the right to inhabit any paper bag or cardboard box that you bring
home for as long as I wish.
I have the right to nap at any time & place I darn well please, without the
distraction of being called or moved just because you want to sit down, wash
your hands or use your computer keyboard.
I have the right to sleep on top of any appliance that is warm.
I have the right to assist in any changing of bed linens & to chase the phantom
creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to look aloof when scolded for mistaking your toes for one of
those pesky phantom creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to kill paper towel rolls that otherwise might sneak up on you at
I have the right to your complete attention anytime you sit down to read or
And, finally, I have the right to be loved, petted, pampered, & entertained, for,
as you know, the best things in life . . . purr.
And, should you err in your ways, I will graciously forgive. After all, you are
only human, but I love you anyway.

The Cat

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Congratulations Al Gore!

Dear Members of The Pooses for Peace,

I am deeply honored to receive the Nobel Peace Prize. This award is even more meaningful because I have the honor of sharing it with the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change--the world's pre-eminent scientific body devoted to improving our understanding of the climate crisis--a group whose members have worked tirelessly and selflessly for many years. We face a true planetary emergency. The climate crisis is not a political issue, it is a moral and spiritual challenge to all of humanity, and to all pooses. It is also our greatest opportunity to lift global consciousness to a higher level.

My wife, Tipper, and I will donate 100 percent of the proceeds of the award to the Alliance for Climate Protection, a bipartisan non-profit organization that is devoted to changing public opinion in the U.S. and around the world about the urgency of solving the climate crisis.

Thank you,

Al Gore

p.s. Please join us at the Casino Calamari for a very Green celebration this weekend... hosted by the Pooses for Peace. Crunchy Granola attire is requested.

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Sing Along With John Prine Tonight!

"But your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more.
We're already overcrowded
From your dirty little war.
Now Jesus don't like killin'
No matter what the reason's for,
And your flag decal won't get you
Into Heaven any more."

John Prine will be our guest tonight at the Casino Calamari to celebrate his birthday. The founders of Pooses for Peace, Zevo Calamari, Miss Lucy Fur and Miss Boo will be singing back-up vocals. Unconfirmed soures report that Nubi Wan Kenobi will be playing drums and Bubba will be playing bass. (We can only hope that Zevo's pet human does not attempt to play banjo with the group.)

Come join the Pooses for Peace tonight at the Prine Sing-Along.

Illegal smile catnip brownies with an all you can eat tuna & turkey buffet will provided.

Visit The Planet Calamari Shop


Happy Birthday John Lennon

Give Peace a Chance!

This plea for peace has been brought to you by :
The Pooses for Peace Foundation

Visit the Cafe Pax boutique for peaceful art on clothing and other gifts.


I am very busy and important

As a majority shareholder and member of the board of directors of Four Paws Acupuncture , it is part of my fiduciary responsibility to keep up to date with important information. I highly recommend that you encourage your pet humans to read this PET FOOD REPORT published by the Animal Wellness Magazine. You can subscribe to this informative magazine at

Click on for more information about K9 acupuncture.


Commotion at the Haunted Happenings Parade


Last night hordes of drunk cats, dogs, skunks and squirrels turned the tiny town of Salem upside down during the Haunted Happenings Parade.

The commotion began when Mayor Kimberly Driscoll tried to upstage the Gatti della Strega sui Vespas by proclaiming she would lead the parade instead of the cats on vespas. The mayor dressed in her one and only black suit had not bothered to even wear a costume for the kick off parade. Unconfirmed sources report that she was given a choice by Strega Queen Zevo Calamari, of either wearing a costume and riding with the cats on a vespa or walking behind them in her only suit.

Mayor Driscoll, suffering from George Bush syndrome, is known for doing only what she wants and refused to concede. Her black pants had tinges of red on them after the brawl. Unconfirmed sources report that she lost her watch and a pair of earrings. The mayor plans to ask for another $20,000 raise from the city council to cover her expenses.

This morning hung-over pooses were found sleeping on the streets, the wharf and on top of cars. Mayor Kim Driscoll said she will use every resource possible to stop this from occurring at next years parade.

Meanwhile George Clooney, Jennifer Aniston and Whoopi Goldberg were seen eating breakfast at Reds this morning.

Poose-cam live from Salem brought to you by Zevo Calamari's Kitty Cat Cafe


Cats and Celebrities Invade Salem, MA

Salem, MA

Cats and celebrities from around the world have been flocking to Salem , MA during the past few days to participate in the annual Haunted Happenings parade. It is the official kick off to the Halloween Season.

Keeping with tradition, the Strega Queen, Zevo Calamari will be leading the parade with the Gatti della Strega sui Vespas, ( witch cats on vespas) A party after the parade will be held in Salem's famed Casino Calamari.

Unconfirmed sources report that the cast of the Rocky Horror Show, Bewitched and Practical Magic will also be riding vespas along with the cats.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll has issued warnings to the locals of wearing any valuable jewelry to the parade. She still claims that her earrings were stolen by pooses at last years event.

Poose-cam live from Salem brought to you by
The Planet Calamari Shop