Boo asked that we post this!
Cats are animals (who) know what their rights are.
-Eli Khamorov
I am the cat, & I have certain inalienable rights:
I have the right to walk over your face anytime I wish, day or night.
I have the right to observe & comment on any & all bathroom behavior.
Further, I have the right to be highly offended by any closed door.
I have the right to smell your shoes to determine if you have been fraternizing
or cavorting or frolicking with any highly questionable animals.
I have the right to assist in any food preparation, cooking, cleaning, or eating
event that may occur in the home.
I have the right to wake you at 3:00 in the morning if I find my food dish is not
to my satisfaction.
I have the right to tip over any water container I deem unsuitable for
consumption.
I have the right to curse at squirrels & birds that may dare to pass my
windows.
I have the right to inspect any grocery items that come into the home. Further,
I have the right to inhabit any paper bag or cardboard box that you bring
home for as long as I wish.
I have the right to nap at any time & place I darn well please, without the
distraction of being called or moved just because you want to sit down, wash
your hands or use your computer keyboard.
I have the right to sleep on top of any appliance that is warm.
I have the right to assist in any changing of bed linens & to chase the phantom
creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to look aloof when scolded for mistaking your toes for one of
those pesky phantom creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to kill paper towel rolls that otherwise might sneak up on you at
night.
I have the right to your complete attention anytime you sit down to read or
work.
And, finally, I have the right to be loved, petted, pampered, & entertained, for,
as you know, the best things in life . . . purr.
And, should you err in your ways, I will graciously forgive. After all, you are
only human, but I love you anyway.
Signed,
The Cat
Visit The Planet Calamari Shop
4 comments:
Hmm.... I'll have to work tis into a speech again...
Oh my, those are so very true.
Who can we get in Congress to get this into a bill so it will be the law of the land?
I'm calling Nancy Pelosi's cell number right now!
Lucy Fur
Oh that is a very wise Bill of Rights for us kitties. We would humbly submit this one, too:
"I have the right to walk on your keyboard and close any offensive windows or documents while you are working on them if I deem that too much attention is being paid to them and not me."
Purrs,
Mr. Chen & Ollie
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