Planet Calamari Zazzle shop

2008-12-31

Happy New Year's Eve!


AP
Hillcrest, CA

The rainbow section of San Diego known as Hillcrest has been flooded with hordes of well dressed cats and celebrities today, coming in from all over the country. Tonight the celebrity cats known as the Pooses for Peace will be holding their New Years Eve gala at Mo's, (formerly known as Hamburger Mary's).

Miss Lucy Fur and Miss Boo who still live in Hillcrest coordinated the last minute party details. Extra tequila has been brought up from Mexico for the party. Unconfirmed sources report that George Clooney may be escorting Miss Boo to the party. Donatella Versace flew in this morning with couture for the cats to wear this evening.

Miss Lucy Fur, BFF with Oprah has brought in Racheal Ray to cook for the evening. Many are concerned that Miss Lucy Fur is once again off her medication. The last time the cats had a party at MO's the San Diego swat team was called in for a cat fight started by Lucy Fur. Dr Phil filed a restraining order against Miss Fur last year.

Members of the Bite & Run, Poot and Run and Poop and Run brigades have been invited. There are too many to name. (We apologize for not providing links to all the cats attending or invited since we are typing on an iBook that has been feuding with blogger.com)

Paparazzi are hoping ex presidential canditate Cheysuli will be attending the party this year. Her former bodyguard, Nubi wan Kenobi arrived with roomie Zevo Calamari this morning.

Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari issued a statement as she stepped out of her solar powered limo this morning : "We would like to thank every member of The Bite & Run, Poop & Run and all other Brigades who worked so hard this year for our cause. So many ankles... so little time. But we did it! It was hard. But thanks to your persistance, and lots of tequila we won the battle. We look forward to a positive 2009, and the end of King Chimpy and his evil friends on 1/20/09. Happy 2009....yes we can. Yes we did. Pass me that flask please..........."

The party at MO's begins tonight at 5:00 pm and ends at 2:00 am or when the swat team arrives There will be a house-trashing party at Miss Boo afterwards. The cats ask everyone to bring their own tiaras or top hats.

2008-12-30

Party moved to San Diego............

Zevo .... call me!

I hear that another snow storm will be hitting your area tomorrow. Let's move the New Years Party from Casino Calamari to Mo's in San Diego...then afterwards we can have a house-trashing party at my place.

Miss Lucy Fur and i will take care of all the details. Bring your tiara! I guess you can bring Nubi too!!
See you later.
ciao ciao
boo

2008-12-27

Jimmy Buffett Stranded in Salem....Again!


Unconfirmed sources report that Jimmy Buffett is snowed in..again... at the Casino Calamari in Salem, MA. Due to the mandatory No Parking Don't Even Think About Parking Ever Snow ban, his tour bus was forced to park in the Salem Ferry Lot, which has not seen a snow plow in days. ( It seems that every time Mr Buffett visits the Casino Calamari he gets stranded there.) Odd coincidence....

Mayor Kim Driscoll is not happy that the Salem Police have been called in..again.. due to the loud singing and noise coming from the Casino on Christmas night. A birthday party honoring Mr Buffett was given by his close friends, The Pooses for Peace.

The celebrity cats have been nothing but a thorn in her side since she became the mayor of Salem. (Unconfirmed sources say the Mayor is miffed she was not invited to the party due to her poor fashion sense and her refusal to wear a coconut bra with the mandatory parrot head grass skirt instead of her black suit.)

Cats wearing coconut bras, grass skirts and leis invited the police to join the party. Several of the cats had parrots perched on their tiaras. Mayor Kimberly Driscoll denies all reports of Salem Police drinking margaritas and sporting grass skirts. (The mayor is concerned that the Salem Police have already had enough bad press due to the You-Tube incident that happened near Halloween.)

At this time the music and noise continues at the Casino Calamari. Un-manned police cars are still parked outside the Casino. The neighbors who filed the complaint have since been seen wearing orchid leis over their parkas, while drinking margaritas and dancing in the snow,

2008-12-25

Happy Birthday....J........

Happy Birthday Jimmy Buffett!
Today is a Pastafarian Holy Day.

Tonight at the Casino Calamari

Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefer Pooses

All you can drink margaritas and shots of tequila!
Poose buffet of ham, tuna and cat nip brownies
Bring your own parrothead attire

Ho Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rhum
(lyrics by jimmy buffett & ross kunkel-
Music by jimmy buffett roger guth & peter mayer)
Santa's stressed out as the holiday season draws near
He's been doing the same job now going on two thousand years
He's got pains in his brain and chimney scars cover his buns
He hates to admit it, but christmas is more work than fun
He needs a vacation from bad decorations and snow
Mr. claus has escape plans, a secret that only he knows
Beaches and palm trees appear night and day in his dreams
A break from his wife, his half frozen life
The elves and that damn reindeer team

Ho ho ho and a bottle of rhum
Santa's run off to the caribbean
He thinks about boat drinks and fun in the sun
Ho ho ho and a bottle of rhum

Plastic creations and crass exploitations aren't good
He wants to go back to simple toys made out of wood
Just for the weekend he'd like to be peter pan
Get out his long johns and dance with a sword in the sand

Chorus:
Ho ho ho and a bottle of rhum
Santa's run off to the caribbean
Marimbas, calimbas, he's playing steel drums
Ho ho ho and a bottle of rhum

Merry Christmas too!
love
the pooses for peace

2008-12-24

Happy Holidays to All!

It is fiesta time at Casa de Calamari!

Time to break out the margaritas and the Jimmy Buffett CDs! We are going green this year and sending our holiday wishes via email.

Wishing everyone a:

• Blessed Solstice

• Happy Hanukkah

• Festivus for the Rest of Us

• Merry Christmas

• Feliz Navidad

• Buon Natale

• Happy Birthday Jimmy Buffett

• Groovy Kwanzaa

• and a Yes We Can Have a Better New Year!

Ole' to All!
May the Flying Spaghetti Monster touch you with his Noodly Appendage. RAmen!
love
the pooses for peace

ps we will not be visiting much these next few days since the pet human is on the old ibook which does not like blogger.com!

2008-12-23

A Festivus for the Rest of Us!

Happy Festivus!

We invite everyone to the Festivus Celebration at the Casino Calamari tonight. We will be putting up our pole at 5:00 pm followed by the reciting of the List of Grievances and then the Strengths of Feat.

The cast of Seinfeld will be there to party with us!

Wishing everyone a Festivus Miracle!
xxoxoxo

2008-12-22

Festivus Eve Rantings

I am preparing my list of grievances for tomorrows Feast of Festivus. Do you like my Holiday Hut? It's not bad for a recycled Cafepress box. I think it should be filled with more cat nip and several more birdie toys. I suppose i will have to add these things to my list.





As you can see our tree is only decorated with a tiny strand of lights and a Flying Spaghetti Monster tree topper. I helped make that. However during the entire time the pet human was crocheting his Noodly appendages she kept screaming "Nubi stop eating the yarn! STOP IT NOW!". This shall be one of my grievances on the list.

The pet humans will not put any presents under the tree since we like to eat the ribbon then puke it up at 3;00 am. (That will be another one of my grievances... the lack of ribbon to eat!) Oh and they won't put tinsel or anything else we could eat or whap on the tree. So unfair.

While i am making out the list i would like to add the following grievances:

I do not like that the female pet human leaves for several hours each day. She should stay home and nap with me.

The male pet human should feed me more and allow me to go outside without supervision.

I do not think it is fair that Zevo has seniority over me. Just because she has been with them for 15 years and i have only been with them for 2 is just not right.

I think they should buy me some real birds to chase around the house this Christmas instead of the fake birdie toys.

I should be paid $5 every time they scream "Nubi get down off of that_________!"(fill in the blank) Then i could retire and buy a much better holiday hut somewhere warm with real birds.

I do NOT appreciate the female pet human's singing ...especially when she sings the "Smelly Cat" song while cleaning the cat box. Nor do i appreciate her calling me a "poose-head" when i am causing trouble.

I have many more complaints...but it is my nap time.

Wishing everyone a Happy Festivus for the rest of us.

love,

nubi wan kenobi, Jedi poose

p.s. Join us tomorrow for our annual Festivus party at the Casino Calamari.





2008-12-21

Happy Winter Solstice


Happy Solstice! Happy Birthday Frank Zappa! (Today is the last day of Zappadan.)

We are honored that Derby the Sassy Cat has given us the Lemonade Award for our Cat-itude! Here are the rules that go with this award:


The Lemonade Award is given to sites which the giver show either great attitude and or gratitude.
The rules for these awards are:
1. Put the logo on your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who awarded you.
3. Nominate 10 other blogs.
4. Add links to those blogs on yours.
5. Leave a message for your nominees on their blogs

Since we do have "attitude" and since the pet human is in bed sneezing and on an old ibook which does not get along with blogger.com we are going to change this rules.
We are awarding the Lemonade Award to every single member of the Pooses for Peace, every cat who has ever taken part in a Bite &Run, a Poot & Run, a Poop &Run, and a Whap & Run. We thank you for your excellent attitude and express gratitude for your bravery when duty calls. That is so many cats we just cannot list them all ....or have the pet human do html all day in between sneezes.

We wish you a Happy Solstice. We are snowed in with the pet humans today.
xoxoxoox
The Pooses for Peace

2008-12-19

Bill O'Reilly Victim of a Pastafarian Attack


FOX NEWS ALERT

During Bill O'Reilly 's latest commentary on the War on Christmas a horde of cats dressed like pirates sprung from behind his desk and attacked him screaming Hail to the Flying Spaghetti Monster! Fox News immediately cut to a commercial.

Mr. O' Reilly is in stable condition at an undisclosed location. Unconfirmed sources report he suffered major bites and scratches on his head, nose, mouth, knees and ankles. He was given large doses of antihistamines since he is severely allergic to cats, (and a cat hater). His blackberry and watch were lost in the scuffle.

This past week Bill O'Reilly had blamed the members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and those who celebrated Festivus, as the cause of the recession and the reason people are no longer saying Merry Christmas. In one segment of his War on Christmas he kept referring to the members of the church as those "spaghetti people".

Authorities believe it was the infamous "Pooses for Peace Bite & Run Brigade" responsible for the attack. Several members of the Pooses for Peace are devotees of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), which are known as pastafarians.
According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians. Thus wearing full pirate regalia is mandatory during a Pastafarian event...or in this instance, an attack.


This morning Zevo Calamari was ambushed by the local FOX NEWS reporter who screamed.. "ZEVO CALAMARI.. you just bit Bill O'Reilly. What are you going to do now?" Miss Calamarii replied " I'm going to Disneyland! Shiver me timbers! ack bleeeeyuckkkoooo give me a hit of rum, yo ho yo ho it's a pirates life for me! Hail to the FLying Spaghetti Monster and May you be touched by his Noodly Appendage. RAmen"

2008-12-15

How to recycle your shoes.......

Oh Lucy Fur and Boo.....Quick! .... Lookie....i found a use for that box of 2007 Jimmy Choo shoes we never wear anymore.........

2008-12-13

Laura Bush Latest Victim of Bite & Run Ambush



Laura Bush Tells Obamas...No Room at The Inn.

The Bush administration has denied President-elect Barack Obama's request to move early into an official guest house across from the White House, claiming previously scheduled commitments

The Obamas wanted to move into Blair House before Jan. 5, so that daughters Malia and Sasha could start classes on time at their new school in Washington, trying to keep with the Bush administrations "No Child Left Behind" act.

"But there were previously scheduled events and guests that couldn't be displaced, such as Karl Rove's surprise birthday party, a Haliburton Gala and the Bush twins' holiday drinking festival." said an underpaid spokesperson, who agreed to be quoted only on condition of anonymity for fear that Laura Bush would retaliate.

Sally McDonough, a spokeswoman for first lady Laura Bush, said in a statement that Blair House will be "available to President-elect Obama and his family starting January 15, as is historically the case." Prior to that, McDonough said, "There is no room at the Inn. If Mr Obama should need to use it for a meeting that benefits the Bush family or its agenda, then he can use it. Perhaps there is a stable with some cows and sheep and a drummer boy, somewhere in DC they can stay." Thinking the microphone was off she added "Laura thinks those (deleted F-word) Hussein kids are a bunch of elitist liberals and terrorists should stay in Chicago as long as possible where they belong. How dare they come to our pristine white house."

During one of her walks with Barney and the other dog (the one nobody seems to know the name of) this afternoon, Mrs Bush was ambushed by a horde of cats wearing tiaras, black leather jackets and one wearing a Jedi robe swinging a light saber.

Secret Service arrived too late to prevent the bites and scratches on her knees and ankles. Mrs Bush was immediately given an antihistamine and rushed to an undisclosed hospital. She is in stable condition. Her earrings, watch and blackberry are missing at this time. Her polyester designer suit from Walmart was completely shredded.

Barney and the other dog seemed to be amused by the cats, as if they recognized them and did nothing to defend their owner. An unconfirmed source claims the dogs were clapping.

As of yet no suspects are in custody. Authorities are reluctant to blame the infamous celebrity cat Bite & Run group commanded by the Pooses for Peace, however it does fit their M.O. The cats were in Washington this weekend with BFF Oprah to help plan their inauguration gala.

When asked about the attack on Laura Bush today, Miss Lucy Fur of the Pooses for Peace said, "Ack ...cough.. gag... give me a hit of whatever is in that flask. I have a cheap perfume and polyester taste in my mouth....... gulp.... um... Laura Who? ..... Did Barney ask about me? Were the Queen's corgies there?,,,,,, Do you think this blackberry matches my tiara? "

The Pooses for Peace offered the Obama family a place to stay at their top secret Hotel Calamari for as long as they need it. No word yet from the Obama camp if they will accept the offer.

2008-12-10

Bite & Run Sting Operation


CHICAGO -- Federal agents arrested Illinois Gov. Blagojevich and a senior aide Tuesday for what prosecutors described as a political-corruption crime spree, including allegations they tried to sell the Senate seat of President-elect Barack Obama and blame it on the celebrity cats known as The Pooses for Peace.

Miss Lucy Fur, one of the leaders of the organization is best friends with Oprah and the cats visit Chicago on a regular basis to stay with her.

Unveiling the federal criminal complaint at a news conference, U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald said Mr. Blagojevich had "taken the state to a new low. Fortunately we enlisted the Pooses for Peace and their covert Bite & Run patrol to assist in this arrest."

Special Op forces of the Bite & Run along with the FBI were able to arrest Blagojevich in a surprise attack. Blogojevich is said to have several bite and scratch marks on his knees and ankles. FBI agents were able to ambush the governor unexpectedly while he was sneezing from all the cat hair. The Governor lost his watch and blackberry in the ambush. His wife reports losing a pair of earrings and a matching bracelet.

The arrests came five years after federal authorities began investigating Mr. Blagojevich's alleged fund-raising and influence-peddling schemes. For the past two months, investigators have been listening on wiretaps to profanity-laced conversations about the governor's alleged plans to profit from his authority. "I want to make money," he said in one conversation, according to a 76-page federal affidavit. "I want to make as much money as those damn (*#!@ing deleted expletive) celebrity cats do! Somebody get some (deleted expletive) dirt on them. Then we will blackmail them and blame them for trying to sell this (once again deleted f word) Senate seat. Those cats are always selling stuff on Ebay"

Pooses for Peace spokes-poose Zevo Calamari issued a statement : First let me say we never sold anything like Bono's sunglasses on Ebay. We were proud to be a part of this sting operation. Patrick Fitzgerald is kind of cute in a penal code kind of way....um.... but he is not my type. And what kind of name is Blagojevich? And um like...what is with the Elvis hair?
Happy Zappadan .... Pass the champagne please.
"

2008-12-08

In Memory

9 October 1940 – 8 December 1980


We miss you John Lennon!
give peace a chance

today we will be purring for peace
xoxoxo
the pooses for peace

2008-12-06

More Jewelry Disappears.....

Robbers in drag get euro80M in Paris jewelry theft


PARIS (AP) — Police say robbers — some dressed in drag — some in what appeared to be a horde of cats wearing tiaras, made off with euro80 million ($100 million) in loot from a lightning-fast jewelry store robbery in central Paris.

A police official says the three or four thieves swiped rings, necklaces and luxury watches from display cases at the Harry Winston store near the Champs-Elysees.

The official said Friday at least one of the bandits was a dog in drag and at times spoke what seemed to be a foreign language with lots of barking and yelping. Unconfirmed sources claim the dog was US presidential contender, Mike Huckabee's ex bird-dog Dude who ran off earlier this past summer to join the Pooses for Peace. A security guard on duty reported hearing Frank Zappa music coming from an iPod that one of the cats was sporting.

A spokeswoman for the U.S.-based chain could not be reached for comment about Thursdays holdup.

Police said it was among France's biggest-ever jewelry thefts. Authorities have no suspects at this time.

Pooses for Peace member Miss Boo who happened to be in Paris with BFF Miss Lucy Fur and Zevo Calamari issued a statement today. " Hmmmm....what jewelry? Can i have a swig of that champagne? Do you think this watch makes me look fat?" Miss Lucy Fur had no comment but looked absolutely divine in her Versace couture.

Zevo Calamari added "Oh.... like um ,,,, happy Zappadan. Don't forget to floss! .... totally... um like...pass me the champagne please..."

2008-12-03

Merry Zappadan


Tis the season of
Zappadan December 4th through December 21

We pooses are all way to young to remember Frank Zappa. However, Zappadan is a very important holiday according to our pet human.

Frank Zappa was born in the very same hospital as our pet human ...and passed away on her birthday in 1993. (She took it personal...and needless to say she was very excited to hear that others dedicated a season to him that starts on her birthday) The festival of Zappadan runs from the date of Frank's death, 12/4, through the date of his birth, 12/21.

We learned of this holiday from the blog crooksandliars.com "The third annual Festival of Zappadan is right around the corner, my friends, and here at The Aristocrats we eagerly await your artistic offerings."

So we invite everyone to celebrate Zappadan at the Casino Calamari for the entire season.

Bring your own dental floss, and we will provide entertainment, munchies and of course tequila.

Oh... and a happy birthday to our pet human. (We think she would like this quote too!)

“I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.”
Frank Zappa

2008-12-02

Happy Birthday Nubi wan Kenobi!


Today is my birthday. I am six.

Usually the Pooses for Peace give me a blow-out party at some extravagant location with lots of celebrities and tequila. We are laying low until this Winona Ryder missing jewelry thing is forgotten.

So this year i would like to stay home with my pet humans and have a nice quiet evening with perhaps some cat nip and lots of birdie toys. (I do hope they remember to buy me the ones with feathers.) The pet humans are finally back from their trip to Oz. (Well.. at least that is what i heard the female said. Not sure about the flying monkeys reference.)

Zevo promised me a new light saber if i promised not to rat on her about the stolen ring from Spain ..um... since she loves me so much.

2008-12-01

What Ring?


MADRID - Police in Spain are investigating $125,000 in missing designer jewelry last seen on Winona Ryder at an event on Sunday.

Winona was loaned a Bulgari bracelet and ring, which she wore to a Marie Claire event in Spain last weekend, but the jewelry has gone missing.

A source told Access Hollywood that Winona left the jewels in her hotel room the morning following the event. But, when someone was dispatched to collect the bracelet and ring, they couldn’t be found.

The jewelry disappearance is the latest incident to make headlines from the actress’s European trip. Last week Miss Ryder reported being bit by a horde of cats wearing tiaras and one wearing a Jedi Robe. Unconfirmed sources claim these were the infamous Pooses for Peace who have had an on going feud with Miss Ryder for several years.

Authorities are ruling out the possibility that the cats are suspects of this particular robbery . They have a witness willing to testify that they stayed in Salem this past Thanksgiving Day weekend and had a house-trashing party and a seance. The pet sitter even left a note which may be used as evidence at a later date.

2008-11-25

Happy Thanksgiving!

We would like to wish everyone a very happy Thanksgiving. Please come join us for a house trashing fiesta this week! So sorry we will not be able to visit everyone. The pet human is not cooperating with our demands.

Oh.....next week we will be having a surprise party for Nubi wan Kenobi. shhhhhhhhhhhhhh

xoxoxoxoxo
zevo and the pooses for peace

2008-11-19

Holiday Work for Pooses!



Pooses... are you looking for work during the holidays? Learn to be a substitute poose! With so many parties and festivities happening during the holiday season, many pooses need to hire substitutes to fool their pet humans in thinking they are still home. How do you think the celebrity Pooses for Peace are able to leave home so often without their pet humans freaking out? It is the work of well trained sub pooses.

The Holiday Semester at The Calamari Institute of Substitute Pooses begins next week. Learn a fun new career and the art of substituting. You to can be a successful career poose! Get certified in two weeks. We also offer job placement services.

Meet some of the happy graduates of The Calamari Institute of Substitute Pooses.
All have gone on to sub for famous celebrity pooses like Miss Boo, Lucy Fur, Tao and Zevo Calamari. Living the good life, being fed, poosed, by pet humans who do not know that their real pooses are off consorting with the glitteratti.

Call our admissions office right now. Don't delay. Operators are standing by.
1-800-BOO-ZEVO

Hablamos espanol!

And after you make lots of money please Visit The Planet Calamari Shoppe and shop until you drop!

2008-11-16

Lindsay Lohan Victim of Bite & Run

AP
PARIS
Fur lover Lindsay Lohan showed up for a red-carpet event in Paris on Saturday and was dusted with flour by an animal activist.

The "Mean Girls" starlet wasn't hurt, and the powder was easily wiped off her black fur stole and blue sequined dress. Unconfirmed sources report that immediately after her dusting, she was attacked by the a horde of cats wearing tiaras and one in a Jedi robe swinging a light saber. Miss Lohan was taken to the hospital and is stable condition. Her sunglasses, designer shoes and earrings were lost on the way to the hospital.

Spokes-poose Zevo Calamari of the Pooses for Peace issued a statment. "Please give me a glass of Pastis to rinse out this wretched taste in my mouth...If you are going to wear fur as an accessory, you should just carry one of us around instead of donning a dead animal. We are warning all of you fur wearing stick insects...wear fur and we will bite you."

The celebrity cats Zevo Calamari, Miss Boo, Lucy Fur and Nubi wan Kenobi were in Paris over the weekend.

2008-11-10


Ciao Ciao...

We are back from celebrating in Chicago with Oprah... well Miss Lucy Fur is still there shopping for a gown with her BFF for the inauguration ball. I plan on having something done by Donatella. Check out these cool earrings i scored ..i mean... um....i found while i was there.

Zevo and Nubi are back in Salem recovering and preparing for a major house trashing party near Thanksgiving...

We have decided to take some time off to rest up for the holidays and for january 20, 2009. President-elect Obama has asked The Pooses for Peace for help in cleaning up Washington when he is elected. I say we need some major nap time to prepare. It will be so nice to actually hear a president speak who can complete a full sentence and properly say the word nuclear!

Meanwhile please enjoy this lovely new website www.wanderingeye-photo.net that my pet human has created. Don't tell her is said this, but she is a most excellent photographer.. ..though she should spend more time taking pictures of me.

Ciao for now,
purrs and kisses
Miss Boo

2008-11-05

Oprah & Friends

Associated Press
Chicago

After her star-studded "get out the vote" party on yesterday's show, the Big O headed down to Grant Park to cheer on our newly-elected president that she'd supported all along. With her was BFF celebrity cat Miss Lucy Fur and The Pooses for Peace other celebrity cats, Miss Zevo Hussein Calamari and Miss Boo. All wearing tiaras and Obama sequined t-shirts.

Presidential hopeful Cheysuli and her Jedi body guard Nubi wan Hussein Kenobi were also invited. Unconfirmed sources report that Mike Huckabee's bird-dog Dude was seen wearing fishnets and a boa.

Other friends of the Pooses for Peace attended the celebration as well. All members of the Bite & Run, Poop & Run and the infamous Poot & Run Brigades were seen at the grand celebration. Several moose, wolves, polar bears and other endangered pooses were there to celebrate.

In his acceptance speech President-Elect Obama thanked Cheysuli for her endorsement during the final days of the election. Obama is said to offer Cheysuli a high ranking position in his cabinet soon.

He thanked the Pooses for Peace and their legions of brigades for all the work they did in the name of preserving freedom. " I may need your services again. We will begin cleaning house in Washington DC in January. Will you join me?"

"YES WE CAN.... BITE AND RUN!" chanted the hordes of animals.

Obama finished his speech with "This is a day of Hope for all pooses and because of these amazing sentient beings, we are here today celebrating victory. It is the dawn of a new America. God Bless America. God Bless our Pooses."


2008-11-04

Nov 4th 11:00 PM

LIVE FROM OBAMA PARTY HEADQUARTERS...

YES WE DID!!!!!!!!

back to the party

xoxoxoxo
The Pooses for Peace


Visualize Pawsitive Change!

The candles are lit. We will be napping and purring the rest of the day for a pawsitive out-come of this election.

Cheysuli was our first choice. However... in light of the dark forces this country are facing we will be purring for Obama today.
We know that Cheysuli will be appointed in a high ranking position in Washington as soon as he is elected!

Yes we can. Si se puede!
The Pooses for Peace

2008-11-03

Paws for Obama

POOSES FOR PEACE ENDORSE OBAMA

In the latest twist of the US elections, the Pooses for Peace have now changed their endorsement from Presidential Candidate Cheysuli to Obama. The decision came directly from Cheysuli headquarters this morning.

Candidate Cheysuli issued a statement:
“As citizens of a democracy it is not only our right but our responsibility to vote. Further, it is not only a right but a responsibility to speak out when we disagree with the government. The only candidate who seems to understand the latter part of that is Barak Obama and I hope you will join me in supporting his cause if you are in a swing state.”

Zevo Hussein Calamari issued a statement this morning as well: " We find it admirable that Cheysuli has stepped back for the good of all. We will endorse her once again when she runs in 2012. The Pooses for Peace are asking all of those who can vote to think about their choice carefully. The past eight years of corruption and cronyism need to be put to an end. We want a positive change. We want HOPE. And we want our country back from these hacks who have been running it into the ground. A vote for McCain and Bible Spice will send this country back to the Middle Ages. We implore you to vote for Barack Obama! The next day we shall be purring and napping for PAWSITIVE CHANGE and HOPE.
YES WE CAN!!!!!!!"

2008-11-01

Feliz Dia de los Muertos!


Salem MA

The ghost of Frida Kahlo and her ghost cat were seen dancing all over Salem MA today. The ghosts visit Salem every year to celebrate the Mexican holiday, the Day of the Dead.

Other ghost sightings have been reported since midnight last night. The ghost of Lucille Ball's cat resembling the celebrity Miss Lucy Fur was seen running through the streets of Salem last night. The ghost of Mae West, looking identical to Zevo Calamari was seen dancing with the ghost of Marilynn Monroe, who was the mirror image of Miss Boo.

In other Salem news.... several hung over cats, skunks, dogs and celebrities were seen roaming the streets this morning. The annual Poose Witch Ball ended last night at 2:00 am. Celebrity cats and movie stars attended the ball in costume. The Pooses for Peace and their renegade Bite & Run, Poop & Run and Poot & Run Brigades attended.

Salem authorities were too busy with the 100,000 rowdy tourists roaming the Witch City to pay much attention to the happenings at the Ball. No cats were arrested. The Hawthorne Hotel had to bring in a biohazard unit after the ball.

Unconfirmed sources claim that Mayor Kimberly Driscoll crashed the ball uninvited and wore a red suit instead of her usual black one thinking it would fool the cats. At this time she has reported that her earrings, watch and new blackberry are missing and several holes in the red suit. The mayor was heard screaming "Where are my earrings and Oh my gawd... what is that smell... I hope I have an extra can of Frebreeze in my caaaaawh........"

There will be a Day of the Dead party held at Casino Calamari tonight with a tequila, margarita bar and tuna nachos. Wear your sombreros! Paint on a uni-brow.
OLE!

2008-10-31

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween or Samhain as we say in Salem, MA ...the black cat capital of the world!

Here is Salem, cats are known as familars when they live with a witch, so we are very popular bunch of pooses!

Tonight is the Halloween Poose Ball. Hoping to see YOU and all our celebrity friends Johnny, George, Nicole,Tim, Oprah, The Dixie Chicks, etc..... (and looking forward to scoring some cool earrings!)

Blessed Be!

2008-10-29

Halloween Week Events

Salem MA

Hordes of pooses and celebrities have been seen wandering through Salem, MA in anticipation of the annual Poose Vampire Ball held at the haunted Hawthorne Hotel this Thursday night. (not to be confused with The Annual Poose Witch Ball is held on Halloween Night at the Casino Calamari)

This event is invitation only. Invitees are picked by the celebrity cats known as the Gatti della Strega (the Witch Cats).
A few years the mayor of Salem was said to have fainted while at the ball, at the sight of Captain Jack Sparrow and claims her earrings were stolen by the cats. The cats and the mayor have been feuding since that event.

Rumors that the cast of Dark Shadows, the original cast from The Rocky Horror Show will attend, as well as Anne Rice, Stephen King, George Clooney, the cast of the old BEWITCHED TV series and the new movie. Brad Pitt with-out scary Angelina & the wretched kids. (It is hoped that Captain Jack Sparrow will come to one of the balls this year given by the celebrity cats.)

This year the mayor was not invited . When asked why the mayor was snubbed, Spokes-poose Zevo Hussein Calamari replied "She can go hang out at that tacky carnival in her black suit with those carnies that she forced on the city of Salem. Afterwards she can watch the$20,000 light show over the wrecking yard."

The mayor of Salem has brought in extra security for this event and has issued a warning to all residents to keep all valuable jewelry in a safe deposit box for the weekend.

Samantha's Costume shop in Salem has reported that the top selling costume for female cats is the "Cheysuli Presidential" costume. For younger male cats, the "Nubi wan Kenobi Jedi "costume has been flying off the racks. Other costumes such as Bite & Run jackets, Poop & Run jackets and Poot & Run jackets seem to be very popular this year with many of the cat tourists.

MORE SPOOK-TACULAR EVENTS!

Strega Zevo Calamari will be reading paws and the tarot every night at the Hawthorne Hotel in the haunted room. Please call for reservations. Strega Zevo Calamari is known as the psychic to the stars and has consulted with celebrities, diplomats and royalty. (Unfortunately some of those such as Britney Spears, John McCain and the mayor of Salem have not heeded her warnings of crash and burn syndrome.)

Madam Booooooooooo will be conducted ghost tours through out Salem each evening at 9pm. Only the brave of heart should dare to walk with her as she takes you through the graveyards, haunted houses and the finale.... the House of the Seven Gables to meet the ghost of Nathaniel Hawthorne.

Nubi Wan Kenobi, The official Black Cat of Salem will be signing autographs at the Witch Museum daily. Bubba the cat will be performing magic tricks also.

Join The Countess Lucy Fur On the haunted tall ship
The Friendship for an evening of spook-tac-ular ghost stories.

Visit Tao and Sarge's Natty Boh and Tuna cake stand in The Salem Commons for a tasty treat.



Don't Forget!
The Annual Poose Witch Ball

will be held at The Casino Calamari
on Halloween Night from 10pm- ?
open nip-tini bar
all you can eat buffet!
Costumes are mandatory.
Call 1-800-boo-zevo for tickets.


2008-10-27

Madame Calamari Reads Tarot


Madam Zevo Calamari will be reading tarot cards all week in Salem
for all pooses who are visiting the Witch City.


We would like to thank everyone who danced in the Thriller Parade and the Time Warp Dance this past weekend. Festivities will continue all week!

We would like to wish our male pet human a happy happy birthday today. So the pet humans will not be around to help us blog today or tomorrow.

Now... The cards are telling me something ... hmmm...i see lots of stinky goodness in this reading.... a bottle of tequila ............................new earrings for Boo.......a new TV show for Miss Lucy....... and the election..... hmmm hard to see the dark side is?

2008-10-24

Halloween Week With The Pooses!

To celebrate our victory um ...mistrial of the Pooper-Gate trial we are inviting all of our friends to come to Salem, MA.. the Halloween capital of the planet for the entire week. All will be welcome to stay at the Hotel Calamari.

We will begin the festivities with the Thriller Parade. (Please practice the thriller dance before the parade!) The Parade will start this Saturday night at 8:00 pm in downtown Salem. Wear your costumes! (Don't worry Michael Jackson was not invited....he scares us)

After the parade at Midnight there will be a special showing of the Rocky Horror Show for all pooses. Bring your time warp costumes!

See you there! We will keep you posted on the activities all week. So many parties.. so little time.
It will be Spook-tacular!

HauntedHappenings.org

2008-10-23

BREAKING NEWS FROM FOX

FOW NEWS

THIS JUST IN FROM THE POOPER-GATE TRIAL AT SALEM MASS......

The Pooper-Gate Trial has just been declared a mistrial. Judge Bigbroom has ordered the evacuation of all in in attendance at the trial today after a strong and deadly odor filled the court room. People began gagging, choking and fainting from the stench. Salem's under-staffed EMT units were sent in along with a Bio-hazard team to clear the building.

The scent seemed to start in the direction where several cats in the Poot and Run Brigade were seated. However unconfirmed sources believe the smell actually started near the judge who was rumored to have dined on cabbage, beans and brussel sprout omelets at the local cafe known as The Witch's Brew.

Authorities are ruling out a terrorist plot as of now. However, we are FOX NEWS are certain those liberal Pooses for Peace had something to do with this latest commotion in the city of Salem.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll in her black suit was over heard saying " Cough, ackkk gag .. ack.. oh my gawd that smell.. ack... Do you think Febreeze will get the smell out of my suit? Gag... now....whaare did I pawk my cah? I am late for my lobstaah lunch."

Boston legal duo Denny Crane and Alan Shore issued this statement:" We are very proud to have been defending The Pooses for Peace. We know that they would have been found innocent........ Now where can we get a few decent martinis?"

2008-10-20

Pooper-Gate Trial Continues


Associated Press
Salem MA

Denny Crane and Alan Shore showed up in suits and not flamingo costumes, at the Salem Courthouse today to avoid a contempt charge. The Boston legal firm is representing the Pooses for Peace in the Pooper-Gate Scandal. The infamous duo plan to show that Pooping and Running is protected by the Constitution and is a form of freedom of speech.

Miss Zevo Hussein Calamari was called to the witness stand by prosecutors. Miss Calamari took an oath to tell the truth with her paw on the Holy Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster instead of the Bible. Miss Calamari is a pastafarian.

Special Prosecutor:"Do you solemnly swear the tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you The Flying Spaghetti Monster?"

Zevo Calamari :"I do. RAmen"

Special Prosecutor: "Are you responsible for the commotion caused at the Haunted Happenings Parade this year?"

Zevo Calamari : " Hmmm? What parade? What do you think about this tiara? Does it make me look fat?"

Special Prosecutor: "Answer the question Miss Calamari."

Zevo Calamari:" I did. You didn't answer mine."

Special Prosecutor: Your Honor, I have no more questions at this time. The witness keeps throwing kisses at the jury and I believe this cat has tequila breath."

Zevo Calamari: "What tequila? Do you have any? Can i have a shot?"

Later today the prosecutors plan to call The Meezers to the stand. Unconfirmed sources believe that The Meezer gang leads the Poop & Run and Poot & Run Brigades responsible for the incident at the Haunted Happenings Parade.

The defense will call Miss Boo and Miss Lucy Fur to the stand along with Ted Kennedy who has come to the defense of the cats in the past.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll and her black suit will be called by the prosecutors later this week. The What Not to Wear crew has been banned from the courthouse.

2008-10-16

DAY ONE... POOPER-GATE TRIAL


Associated Press
Salem MA

The infamous Boston legal duo Denny Crane and Alan Shore arrived today at the Salem Courthouse dressed in flamingo costumes. Their clients, The Pooses for Peace are charged in the latest Pooper-Gate scandal.

When asked by the judge why they were in costume, Denny Crane responded "It's Halloween in Salem. Denny Crane. Denny Crane."

The Salem Courthouse was packed with celebrities and hundreds of cats, dogs and skunks. George Clooney, Johnny Depp, Nicole Kidman, and Bette Midler all wore Free the Pooses t-shirts.

Leaders of the Bite & Run, Whap & Run, Poop & Run and Poot & Run all wore black leather jackets. Leaders of the Pooses for Peace, celebrity cats Zevo Hussein Calamari, Miss Boo and Miss Lucy Fur wore tiaras and Versace couture.

Nubi wan Kenobi and presidential candidate Cheysuli were not present. However, all the cats had on Vote Cheysuli buttons. Cheysuli is at an undisclosed location for her own safety.

Mayor Driscoll was also there in her only black suit sans jewelry. The What Not to Wear crew were expelled from the courthouse by the Judge for disturbing the proceedings. The crew kept chanting "CHANGE THE BLACK SUIT ...CHANGE THE BLACK SUIT " at the Mayor.

Prosecutors will be calling weatherman Al Roker to the stand later today to prove that the cats have terrorist links.

2008-10-15

Clooney Saves the Day!

Associated Press
Salem MA

George Clooney rode into Salem MA early this morning and put up the $1 million dollar bail to free The Pooses for Peace from jail. The celebrity cats have been charged with illegal activities in the Pooper-Gate investigation. Rumors have been spreading that Miss Boo and Clooney are a couple.

Unconfirmed sources report that Clooney will be paying the legal expenses of the Boston legal firm, Crane Pool and Schmidt. The trial begins later this week.

Celebrities are said to be pouring into Salem in support of the cats. All were invited to watch the presidental debates at The Casino Calamari tonight and participate in the drinking game called "Do a shot of tequila every time John Mccain seys "My Friends" .

The Pooses for Peace support presidential candidate Cheysuli who was not invited to be in the debates.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll in her only black suit issued a statement this morning. " Curses! Somebody always helps those cats. Oh... am I invited tonight too?"

2008-10-13

BREAKING NEWS FROM FOX



FOX NEWS
SALEM MA



This just in from our sources in Salem MA....... The Pooses for Peace have been found guilty in the Pooper-Gate investigations.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll announced that the city of Salem will press charges against the Pooses for Peace for their participation in organizing Poop and Run Brigades at the Haunted Happenings Parade.

Celebrity cats, Zevo Hussein Calamari, Miss Boo and Miss Lucy Fur head the liberal organization known as the Pooses for Peace. In the past the cats have led Bite & Run attacks against Karl Rove, Donald Rumsfeld, Dick Cheney and other fine upholding US citizens.

The cats led the Haunted Happenings parade in Salem, MA two weeks ago and invited hundreds of cats and several liberal communist celebrities to ride along with them on Vespas, Harleys and in solar powered cars. Their cohorts known as The Meezers led the Whap & Run, Poop & Run and Poot & Run Brigades causing a strain on Salem's sanitary units.

Zevo Hussein Calamari's roommate, Nubi wan Hussein Kenobi, (a black cat and possibly a Muslim) is the body guard to renegade presidential candidate Cheysuli. ...once again proof that Cheysuli is befriending dangerous friends and hanging out with terrorists. The cats are also friends with weatherman Al Roker.

Mayor Driscoll in her one and only black suit issued a statement this morning. "Pooper-Gate is a far more serious issue than the so called scandal Trooper-Gate that poor innocent VP candidate Sarah Palin has been accused of. We hope to have these cats convicted as soon as possible and sent to Guantanamo Bay."

No comment has been issued by the Pooses for Peace. At this time they have retained the legal services of one of Boston's most scandalous law firms, Crane, Poole and Schmidt.




Stay tuned to Fox News... A Fair and Balanced Source. Coming up next Sarah Palin's newest fashion line... white robes with hoods!

2008-10-10

Happy Birthday John Prine!

Casino Calamari invites you to join us to celebrate
John Prine's Birthday tonight!


Illegal Smiles for all.
Niptinis and tequila

Sing along with John.........

That's the Way that the World Goes 'Round
© John Prine

I know a guy that's got a lot to lose.
He's a pretty nice fellow but he's kind of confused.
He's got muscles in his head that ain't never been used.
Thinks he own half of this town.

Starts drinking heavy, gets a big red nose.
Beats his old lady with a rubber hose,
then he takes her out to dinner and buys her new clothes.
That's the way that the world goes 'round.

That's the way that the world goes 'round.
You're up one day and the next you're down.
It's half an inch of water and you think you're gonna drown.
That's the way that the world goes 'round.

I was sitting in the bathtub counting my toes,
when the radiator broke, water all froze.
I got stuck in the ice without my clothes,
naked as the eyes of a clown.
I was crying ice cubes hoping I'd croak,
when the sun come through the window, the ice all broke.
I stood up and laughed thought it was a joke
That's the way that the world goes 'round.


Hot Dog Fun ...My Sister's a Nun!!!!

2008-10-08

TERRORIST LOVING CATS


FOX NEWS
BREAKING NEWS

Unconfirmed sources have reported that The Pooses for Peace celebrity cats are friends with Al Roker, the weatherman..... more proof that these cats are terrorists.

Homeland Security taped a three way conversation with the leaders of The Pooses for Peace. Zevo Hussein Calamari said" We are having lovely fall weather here in Salem." Miss Boo replied , " I wish we had fall weather here in San Diego." Miss Lucy Fur added " Well at least we don't get snow in San Diego!"

We at FOX NEWS are certain that these are secret messages to terrorist cats.

Stay tuned for more fair and balanced news. Coming up next.....Sarah Palin shows us how to shoot a wolf from a helicopter.

2008-10-06

Salem Mayor Calls Emergency Meeting


Associated Press
Salem, MA

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll called an emergency city council meeting today.

Wearing her predictable black suit, Ms Driscoll said: " It is urgent that the city of Salem puts a stop to those menacing cats called The Pooses for Peace, who have cause nothing but trouble since they moved here. Their antics at the last parade were appalling. I call for a vote to evict these cats and their businesses from Salem now. And I want my earrings and Blackberry back now or else!"

Zevo Calamari, spokespoose for The Pooses for Peace and owner of Brothel Calamari Casino Calamari and Cinema Calamari issued a statement as well. " What earrings? What Blackberry? And by the way what we pay in taxes from our businesses, more than covers your raise and your salary. We are not going anywhere. Oh.. pass me a shot of Strega ... thanks...."

2008-10-02

Jack Sparrow Appears at Salem Parade Tonight


BREAKING NEWS
Salem MASS

Captain Jack Sparrow rode into Salem on a jet black Vespa, with the Gatti della Strega sui Vespas, leading the Haunted Happenings Parade this evening. His swagger and the glint in his eyes caused women to swoon and faint all over the parade route, creating a stress on Salem's underpaid EMT system.

Before she fainted, Mayor Kimberly Driscoll called for an emergency back-up from the Boston Fire Department to handle the overload. The mayor lost a pair of earrings and her blackberry when she fainted. As predicted, the mayor wore her black suit to march in the parade. The "What Not to Wear" crew were anxiously waiting a chance to surprise the mayor with a make over. However, since the mayor was rushed to the hospital for a swooning incident the make over has been postponed until next season.

Other celebrities rode with the Pooses for Peace as a sign of solidarity for their cause. George Clooney rode along side Miss Boo on his Harley hog. Oprah, BFF of Miss Lucy Fur rode on a special orange Vespa with her name etched in gold. Zevo Calamari led the cast from the Rocky Horror Show on her blue Vespa. Brad Pitt sans wretched children and Angelina Jolie was seen on a Harley hog too. Hundreds of cats dressed in black witch hats and capes rode Vespas, Scooters and Skateboards too.

Boycotting the presidential debates, David Letterman, Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert in rickshaws peddled by local Salem witches, followed Presidential candidate Cheysuli and her body guard Nubi wan Kenobi in her electric Smart.

Other celebrities who played witches in movies, such as Nicole Kidman, Sandra Bullock, Cher, Bette Midler, rode Vespas and Scooters along with the infamous Bite & Run, Whap and Run Brigades. All wore black witch hats and capes and carried brooms.

The Poop & Run and Poot & Run Brigades were forced to march after the Boston Police Equestrian Patrol. EMT Units had to be called back in to assist all those who were gagging and puking. The City of Salem sent in a Biohazard team to rid the streets of the stench. Incense has been lit all over Salem.

As of 11:00 pm tonight, all the bars, clubs and restaurants in Salem are filled with drunk cats, dogs, skunks and celebrities.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll was not available to comment on the commotion tonight. We expect a press conference tomorrow morning.

2008-10-01

Cats and Vespas Invade Salem MA



Associated Press
Salem, MA

Cats and celebrities from around the world have been flocking to Salem , MA during the past few days to participate in the annual Haunted Happenings parade. It is the official kick off to the Halloween Season.

Keeping with tradition, the Strega Queens, Zevo Calamari, Miss Boo and Lucy Fur will be leading the parade with the Gatti della Strega sui Vespas, ( witch cats on vespas). Other celebrity cats will be riding vespas along with the Pooses for Peace cats. The Bite & Run, Poop & Run and Whap & Run Brigades will also be riding along this year. Presidential candidate Cheysuli will be riding in a solar powered Smart convertible with her bodyguard Nubi wan Kenobi.

A party after the parade will be held in Salem's famed Casino Calamari.

Unconfirmed sources report that the cast of the Rocky Horror Show, Bewitched and Practical Magic will also be riding vespas along with the cats. No word if Miss Boo's paramour George Clooney will be riding in the parade this year. Last year Captain Jack Sparrow rode with the cats on a Harley Hog.

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll has issued warnings to the locals of wearing any valuable jewelry to the parade. She still claims that her earrings were stolen by pooses at a past parade.

Extra security have been brought in to prevent a repeat of last years cat fight between Zevo Calamari and Mayor Driscoll. At last year's parade, The commotion began when Mayor Kimberly Driscoll tried to upstage the Gatti della Strega sui Vespas by proclaiming she would lead the parade instead of the cats on vespas.

The mayor dressed in her one and only black suit had not bothered to even wear a costume for the kick off parade. Unconfirmed sources report that she was given a choice by Strega Queen Zevo Calamari, of either wearing a costume and riding with the cats on a vespa or walking behind them in her only suit. A cat fight broke out when the mayor refused.

No charges were filed as there were no witnesses. However the mayor's black suit had several tears in it after the parade.

Mayor Driscoll issued a statement this morning: "These cats are a menace to society. I have asked for backup Police from Boston and surrounding towns for this years parade. The only reason i tolerate these cats is that they bring in celebrities to our small city to spend money. .. which can then be taxed and pay for my $20,000 raise. Then maybe I can buy another black suit."

An anonymous aid to the mayor said that this year, the mayor will be wearing ankle and knee guards under her black suit at the parade.



Rumors that Brad Pitt will attend on a hog are rampant through out Salem.

2008-09-29

Ya Ba Da Ba Doooooooooo

Cinema Calamari presents
The Flintstone Film Festival


You know.. we completely forgot about one of our favortie cartoons, The Flintstones until Sarah Palin has declared that dinosaurs and humans roamed the earth 6,000 years ago together. You can read about it at our friends The Huffington Post

Maybe Sara thinks it was a documentary and not a cartoon? Anyway.. we will be showing Flintstone cartoons all day instead of watching the news.

Please join us for a YabaDaba Dooooo time! Of course there will be an all you can eat ham and niptini buffett for all pooses.

Happy Monday!

2008-09-26

BLOW UP YOUR TV

The Pooses for Peace invite everyone to follow the advice of John Prine this week.

BLOW UP YOUR TV!


We are tired of watching the nonsense going on in Washington on the news. We are so tired of the propaganda. We don't need no stinking Teeeee Veeee. If we hear that chimp's voice one more time we may puke up all our ham and stinky goodness. If we see that scary woman from Alaska with the weird glasses and the beehive hair do one more time we may have to pull our hair out. And the old man with the lisp and droopy eye gives some of us the "runs".

This is not healthy for pooses or people.

So.... we decided to get unplugged.

Cancel your cable. Save some money. (You will need it to help pay for that $700billion-trillion-zillion bailout for the rich and greedy!)

Rent movies instead. Read books. Meditate. Listen to music. Take lots of naps. Chase birdie toys. Do shots of tequila. Do anything but don't watch TV! Maybe if we ignore them they will all go away!

Have a wonderful weekend. We will be unplugged all weekend waiting for Hurricane Kyle to hit New England.

Sing along with John Prine! ( feel free to substitute the words Buddha, Flying Spaghetti Monster, Bast, Allah, for the word Jesus!)

John Prine Spanish Pipe-dream

She was a level-headed dancer on the road to alcohol
And I was just a soldier on my way to Montreal
Well she pressed her chest against me
About the time the juke box broke
Yeah, she gave me a peck on the back of the neck
And these are the words she spoke

Chorus:
Blow up your T.V. throw away your paper
Go to the country, build you a home
Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches
Try an find Jesus on your own

Well, I sat there at the table and I acted real naive
For I knew that topless lady had something up her sleeve
Well, she danced around the bar room and she did the hoochy-coo
Yeah she sang her song all night long, tellin' me what to do

Repeat chorus:
Blow up your T.V. throw away your paper
Go to the country, build you a home
Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches
Try an find Jesus on your own

Well, I was young and hungry and about to leave that place
When just as I was leavin', well she looked me in the face
I said You must know the answer.
She said, No but I'll give it a try.
And to this very day we've been livin' our way

And here is the reason why
We blew up our T.V. threw away our paper
Went to the country, built us a home
Had a lot of children, fed 'em on peaches
They all found Jesus on their own

2008-09-23

Happy Birthday Bruce Springsteen

Tonight at
Casino Calamari


Birthday Bruce and the E Street Band!

Nip-tini's and all you can eat Thunder Road Buffet

Wear your dancing shoes!


2008-09-22

Emergency Session

Once again we have called an emergency session of Poose Congress to alert everyone of the latest blunder of GW the Chimp. We URGE your pet humans to sign this petition. Why should the tax payers bail out the richest, greediest companies of this country. (Instead that money should be used to feed homeless pooses and people and of course pay off our credit card debts!)

Oh... we decided to let Disneyland keep the statue of Johnny Depp at the Pirates of the Caribbean. This was a much more important issue to fight for!



Congress is on the brink of making a one-sided deal to give George W. Bush a blank check to bail out his pals - offering nearly (or perhaps more than) a trillion taxpayer dollars to Wall Street to cover its bad debts. That works out to somewhere between $2000 and $5000 from every American family. So what do the taxpayers get in return?

Nothing. No new regulation or oversight to help avoid this kind of crisis in the future. No public interest givebacks to help people whose homes are in the hands of the banks. Perhaps most shockingly of all, the taxpayers get absolutely no share in the profits if and when these finance giants bounce back, even though we are now assuming a great deal of the risk.

This is worse than a bad deal - this isn't a deal at all. This is a blank check to some of the richest companies in the world.

I just signed a petition calling on key members of Congress to impose a few sensible conditions to this bailout in order to protect the American people -- I hope you will too.

Please have a look and take action.
CLICK HERE!

2008-09-20


AP NEWS ALERT

This just in from Anaheim, CA...... Cats dressed as pirates led by Bite & Run Commander, Miss Lucy Fur (the cat who is once again off her meds) have taken over The Pirates of the Caribbean Ride and have taken the Johnny Depp statue hostage until their demands are met.

One demand is that the song will be changed to the words "Yo ho Yo Ho a Pooses' Life for me" The other demand is that pirate cats must be added to the decor of the ride, since there is a dog in it.

The same incident happened in 2006. Doctors feel that the Yo Ho Yo Ho song has a hypnotic effect on cats taking medication. The theory is that there is a subliminal message in the song urging cats to stop taking their anxiety medication. Miss Lucy Fur has been on Oprah several times and even bit Dr Phil the last time she was on his show.
The celebrity cats are friends with Johnny Depp. No comment has been issued by Mr Depp at this time.

Swat teams and riot police have been called in... we will keep you posted.

Now back to more propaganda. Sarah Palin has a new line of lipstick called Pitt Bull Lips available only at Wal-mart.