Salem Mayor Calls Emergency Meeting

Associated Press
Salem, MA

Mayor Kimberly Driscoll called an emergency city council meeting today.

Wearing her predictable black suit, Ms Driscoll said: " It is urgent that the city of Salem puts a stop to those menacing cats called The Pooses for Peace, who have cause nothing but trouble since they moved here. Their antics at the last parade were appalling. I call for a vote to evict these cats and their businesses from Salem now. And I want my earrings and Blackberry back now or else!"

Zevo Calamari, spokespoose for The Pooses for Peace and owner of Brothel Calamari Casino Calamari and Cinema Calamari issued a statement as well. " What earrings? What Blackberry? And by the way what we pay in taxes from our businesses, more than covers your raise and your salary. We are not going anywhere. Oh.. pass me a shot of Strega ... thanks...."