Planet Calamari Zazzle shop


Peace Love Pooses

Associated Press
Salem MA

The celebrity cats known as the Pooses for Peace and their friend Captain Jack Sparrow joined Salem's favorite local band Britannica on Derby Wharf last night for the 4th of July festivities. Zevo hussien Calamari, Miss Boo, Miss Lucy Fur, Che Nikki, Nubi wan Kenobi, Luna miso Poosie and numerous other cats danced and sang back up vocals on stage while Britannica played.

Mayor Kimberley Driscoll beefed up security in anticipation that the cats and their pirate friend, Sparrow would commandeer the tall ship known as the Friendship. Unconfirmed sources also claim that Driscoll wore ankle and knee guards under her signature ill fitting black suit for fear of another Bite & Run.

The celebrity cats and the mayor have had several run ins in the past and have been blamed for stealing the Friendship along with another tall ship in the past. Zevo hussein Calamari is still very miffed that she lost the mayoral election to Driscoll because the City of Salem refused to count the thousands of votes cast by cats, dogs, squirrels and people in the election.

Earlier in the day the cats and Capt Jack Sparrow were seen dancing on their own float at the Salem Willows parade. They followed the float mocking the Dominion Coal Plant and Mayor Driscoll.

The cats, Britannica and Sparrow were said to stumble out of The Witches Brew late last night and then partied the night away at the famed Casino Calamari.

Various claims of earrings, watches and diamonds have been reported missing from those attending the parade and concert according to the Salem Police log. No suspects have been named.

Miss Zevo hussein Calamari issued a statement. "What earrings? Does this pirate hat make me look fat? Please pass me another margarita! arrrrrrgh"

1 comment:

The Meezers or Billy said...

hey, this rolex is nice, but i doesn't know how to tell time. - Miles