I would like to thank everyone who has signed up for the Fall semester at the Institute of Professional Biting. Due to the overwhelming enrollment we have hired a few more professors to teach. Professor Anastasia who specializes in biting, especially the "didn't see that coming bite" and the educational bite for humans in training will be teaching a weekend seminar for graduates. Congrats to all.
Now for a more serious matter to all pooses from the Humane Society:
We Did It! Nike Drops Vick
I know you heard from me earlier today or yesterday, but I wanted you to be one of the first to know: Nike announced today that it has suspended Michael Vick's contract without pay and will stop selling all Vick-related products at its stores.
This is a big victory, one that simply would not have happened without your action and those of more than 165,000 others.
As you know, the allegations against Michael Vick are so serious and disturbing that The Humane Society of the United called on his corporate backers to end their commercial relationships with the star player. I’m so pleased that Nike has signaled it has a zero tolerance policy for athletes who may be involved with staged animal fights and other forms of malicious animal cruelty.
Nike's statement reads as follows:
“Nike has suspended Michael Vick’s contract without pay, and will not sell any more Michael Vick product at Nike owned retail at this time. As we’ve said before, Nike is concerned by the serious and highly disturbing allegations made against Michael Vick and we consider any cruelty to animals inhumane and abhorrent. However, we do believe that Michael Vick should be afforded the same due process as any citizen in the United States, therefore, we have not terminated our relationship.”
Also today, Reebok agreed to stop selling Michael Vick-branded products. The company does not have a contract with Vick but has an official relationship with the NFL to sell its merchandise.
Thank you again for all you do for animals.
Sincerely,
Wayne Pacelle
President & CEO
The Humane Society of the United States
We interrupt this blog for some disturbing news.
Now, as cats we are quite aware that wolves would like to make a tasty meal out of us.
However..... that is not a good reason to have them hunted down for sport by humans. These are stunning creatures, even if their eating habits need some adjustments....
So we urge all of you, to please have your pet humans sign the petition to save the wolves. We only have until August 6, 2007 and need 200,000 signatures.
Come on..... who knows.... cats might be next on George Bush's list ........we are all sharing this planet together! Thanks
Tell the Bush Administration to Protect Gray Wolves
We must stop the Bush Administration's plan to declare open season on the wolves of Greater Yellowstone and central Idaho. Once approved, Wyoming and Idaho intend to begin exterminating up to half their gray wolves -- by aerial gunning and other cruel methods -- as early as this fall.
To submit your Official Citizen Comment, opposing this disastrous plan, before August 6. Please CLICK HEREwww.nrdconline.org
CNN
Last night on Larry King, Miss Lucy Fur talked candidly about her misfortunate past as a homeless cat in San Diego. She shed tears while talking about the mistakes she made before she entered rehab and the lessons she learned. (Such as don't hang out with human stick insects named Paris Hilton or Lindsey Lohan!)
Mr King became quite annoyed when she repeatedly changed the subject about the mysterious disappearance of the Mona Lisa and other works of art in the Louvre, while she was in Paris with friends Zevo Calamari and Boo. Miss Fur laughed at the idea that they were jewel thieves.
Miss Fur is anxious to begin working on her talk show which premiers this fall. "I hope everyone will be watching and I hope you all will tune in to my new talk show in the fall. I'm having experts in fashion, jewelry, cuisine, and ankle biting on to share their glamour tips.
Karl Rove has been invited to the pilot episode but hasn't confirmed. His people told my people that he will only come in full body armor."
Karl Rove's office has issued a statement that he will not attend the pilot episode, nor will he be in the presence of a bunch of liberal cats who bit his ankle last year.
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CNN
LARRY KING LIVE
Larry's special guest tonight will be Miss Lucy Fur, celebrity cat best known for her escapades with Zevo Calamari and Miss Boo. She is a co-owner of Hamburger Marys located in Salem , MA, newest hot spot to the stars and her best friend Oprah is helping her to launch a talk show in the fall.
Miss Fur will talk about her shaded past, being homeless in San Diego, last years rehab, biting Dick Cheney and her controversial friends Zevo and Boo. Don't miss this exciting show!
Larry King Live is brought to you by The Planet Calamari Shop
We have decided to take a few days off in Provence. Rolling around in lavender fields, chasing French mice and sipping Pastis is the perfect way to end our trip. We are thinking about buying a vineyard here. Le Jolie Chat Wineries??????
Next week Lucy Fur is meeting with Oprah's people. She will be hosting her own talk show in the fall. Boo is needed at the Golden Door Spa to teach yoga. Nubi and i must return home to Salem and take care of business. Tourist season is almost here.
Meanwhile....... have a wonderful weekend!
My Patis is here.......
au revoir
zevo
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We would like to thank all of you who helped find the orphan tuxedo cats from San Diego a home. There are so many pooses and humans to thank...i feel like i am giving my Oscar acceptance speech. So to save time and so the band will not play.... THANK YOU ALL!
A special thanks to Grr Midnight and Cocoa and their pet humans for going the extra mile to for these cats. We award you the special Catnip of Goodwill Bouquet Award.
Thank you so much!
p.s. We are still in Paris. Come see Lucy Fur perform at the Moulin Rouge tonight!
Allo! Bonjour!
I would so like to say merci to all le wonderful chats who came to ze Bastille Day Partee. Oh la la.... so many pretty dresses! Oh... i so love zee outfit Miss Daisy did wear. And ze shoes on Madame Lucyfur..... soo soo sexy. Madame Boo - she is so chic ...no?
Le Chat Cheysuli is so pretty and so smart. Mdm. Gemini..she is a good dancer...no?
Socre' blu! Zee boy chats Monsieur Chen and Ollie....soo how do you say...??????? handsome? Msr. Lux........ oh la LA! Oh.... i do think ze Oscar ze puppy chat and Msr. Nubi are ze best kissers.
Merci to le chats that nominated my petite ami, Zevo Calamari so many times. I am so sorry zat i take her away from ze computer and she cannot post on ze blog.
Tonight we have pastis and formage...please come!
Merci ....Au Revoir,
audrey tautou
Saturday 14 July 2007
I just took my poose acupuncture boards. Whew! Talk about exhausting. Written, then practicals then more written, then begging and the final exam- acting poosie during a treatment.
My pet human was in desperate need of an acupuncture treatment so i volunteered. Notice how well i stimulated the needles. Who needs an e-stim machine when i am around? She kept screaming, so i know that i was moving chi. I did a small amount of blood-letting by biting her Lung 10... she was complaining about a sore throat. I am certain it had nothing to do with the screaming.
As you can see, i only use Seirin needles. Call me an acu-snob.
Soon i will be setting up my own acupuncture practice. Any ideas for a clinic name?
May the Chi be with you,
Dr. Nubi Wan Kenobi, L.Ac.
Visit the Acu-Punk Cafe clothing for acupuncture lovers and acupuncturists .
We are back from the Live Earth Concert tour. Boo and Lucy Fur are back in San Diego. Nubi is home with me. (Too bad Spinal Tap would not take him with them on their summer tour.)
I am exhausted. So sorry i have not had time to post on everyone else's blogs or take a picture of me in a pink wig or nominate anyone for anything. Being me takes so much work. You have no idea how hard it is to run a brothel, a casino and Hamburger Marys and look good all the time.
( Oh by the way i am a GIRL not a drag queen. Just because my name ends in O does not make me a male. I am named after Miss Zevo from the movie TOYS.)
I really do need to fire my pet human as my secretary. She keeps saying she is soooooo busy working. Doesn't she see that my blog should be the most important job she has?
Someone please bring me a glass of champagne and a tuna platter.....
ciao ciao
zevo calamari
Pop queen Madonna with back up vocalists Zevo Calamari and Mizz Boo, got 70,000 people on their feet demanding action on climate change in a stunning finale to the London leg of Live Earth last night.
The singer was one of the highlights of yesterday's event, which also featured the The Police with Lucy Fur, and even spoof band Spinal Tap with guest poose Nubi Wan Kenobi.
Dozens of school children in school uniform along with hundreds of cats wearing pink wigs sang along to 'Hey You', while footage showed images including polluting factories.
But the biggest moment came when the 48-year-old star called on the crowd to get to their feet.
Thousands cheered as she told the audience: "If you want to save the planet I want you to start jumping up and down. Come on you "poose-heads"
"If you want to save the planet let me see you jump."
Al Gore proclaimed the concerts a success and thanked all the artists and pooses whop helped made it possible.
Poose-cam live from London brought to you by The Planet Calamari Shop
Madonna is giving a small party at her London home tonight to celebrate Frida Kahlo's birthday. We are all so excited to be able to view one of the original Kahlo paintings she owns. I would really love to have one of those hanging in my office........
Boo and i will be wearing borrowed Frida costumes from our friend Salma. Uni-brows are required.
Don't miss our performance tomorrow at the Live Earth Concerts!
adios
zevo
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Al Gore has invited the Pooses for Peace contingent to perform at the Live Earth Concerts this Saturday. Boo and i will be in London singing back-up vocals for our good friend Madonna. Nubi wan Kenobi willl tag along us as our roadie. Maybe Spinal Tap will let him on the stage with them.
Lucy Fur has been invited to sing in New York with her dear friend Sting and The Police. Sarge and Tao will be joining The Dave Matthews band.
There are so many members of Pooses for Peace that i cannot remember where everyone will be on Saturday. It will be a fun day.... and i do hope we can actually help save this planet before it is too late.
For more info on the LIVE EARTH CONCERTS visit liveearth.msm.com
I am celebrating! I have made my July quota for being bad in just two days. Usually it takes the whole month to meet that required 1000 points for tormenting your pet humans.
I successfully knocked over the entire collection of cds near the window.... forcing them to move the cds to another wall. 500 points
Now my favorite window is free for bird watching. 200 points
I also tormented a wasp which stung me and as my pet human was kissing my paw i bit her on the lip. It looks really nice with the brace she is wearing on her arm from falling down the stairs. I had nothing to do with that one. (ha ha!) 200 points
I then chased Zevo's tail all night causing lots of noise and keeping the pet humans up.
100 points
The added bonus was Zevo puking at 3am. She gets 50 points for that.
So time to celebrate! Happy tres de julio!
ole
nubi wan kenobi
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