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2009-08-04

Captain Jack Sparrow Seen on Missing Ship

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Associated Press
Somewhere on the High Seas.....

US Costguards have reported spotting the missing colonial vessel known as the Kalmar Nyckel out on the high seas in route to Hawaii. The ship mysteriously vanished from the Salem Maritime festival sometime Sunday night.

Unconfirmed sources said that the Captain of the Coast Guard ship claims to have seen Captain Jack Sparrow along with several cats in pirate gear drinking rum and dancing on the ship. The Captain has been put on medical leave and is being watched carefully. Other crew members who wish to remain anonymous also claim to have seen cats in pirate costumes. However one reported seeing a cat dressed as a Jedi, but wearing a patch over his eye. Authorities are still not sure if this ship is the Kalmar Nyckel as the name painted on the vessel was The Calamari Nickelodeon.

Salem's Mayor Kimberley Driscoll wearing her trademark black suit released a statement early this morning. "I have no doubt that those wretched cats, the Pooses for Peace have something to do with this latest travesty that has taken place in my beloved city of Salem. We will find this missing ship and punish those who stole it. .... oh by the way did you hear that no one will be running against me in the next election?"

3 comments:

zevo hussein calamari said...

hmmm.... maybe i should run for mayor of salem....pass me some of that rum matey...arrr arrrrrhhh

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Zevo I think that's a fine idea. Nice boat by the way.

Toni said...

I LOVE rum! I mean, I really, really love it! Especially on a hot summer's day.....and especially when I'm entertaining "the captain"....

Sigh.......