Planet Calamari Zazzle shop

2009-12-07

Paparazzi Camped Outside Casino Calamari

Associated Press
Salem MA

The paparazzi has been camped outside the infamous Casino Calamari since Friday. Camera crews and news hounds have been hoping to catch a glimpse of Madam Zevo Calamari and her friends, Miss Boo and a Miss Lucy Fur after rumors spread about Tiger Woods leaving their so called house of ill repute known as the Brothel Calamari. The domestic terrorist cats have not been seen since the Zappadan party last Friday night.

Authorities are still searching the entire city of Salem for the brothel and have yet to find its location. Mayor Kimberly Driscoll has called for back up detectives and the FBI to help locate the illegal "cat house". "These cats are a menace to society. This is NOT the kind of tourist attraction we want Salem to be known for! ,.... Um.....Where is my iPhone and what is that smell?"

As of tonight at least 8 possibly 10 women have claimed to have had affairs with Tiger Woods. One can only imagine what the number is if it is true he visited the Brothel Calamari.


2 comments:

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Hard to say how many... Hey--and I worked in politics and I'm having trouble keeping up!

Ailurophile said...

Shocking development indeed. All the world's eyes are now on Casino Calamari.. hope whatever comes out of it is not too explosive a news item..

Hope all has been well. Best wishes for the coming holidays :)