BREAKING NEWS FROM MICHIGAN
Moments after Mitt Romney was declared the winner of the Republican primary in Michigan last night, hordes of cats wearing Seamus the dog t-shirts, tiaras and one with a light saber descending upon the ex governor of MA. Unconfirmed sources claim to have seen Dude the Bird dog, former dog of Mike Huckabee wearing fishnets, a tiara and a boa running with the cats.
Mr Romney was rushed to an undisclosed hospital and was being treated for bites and scratches. He was released this morning. At his press conference today he claimed that the cats were unusually large and most probably illegal alien cats or terrorists. He had no comment about the cats wearing t-shirts with his dead dog's photo.
There has been no comment from the Huckabee camp on Dude the Bird Dog's adoption to Liza Minnelli or the rumors of his cross dressing.
No suspects have been named for this latest Bite & Run incident. We at Fox News are positive it is the work of those liberal, heathen cats known as the Pooses for Peace.
Stay tuned.... Next up.... latest photos of Britney Spears in Mexico with a Frida Kahlo uni-brow..................